It sounds more like you’re wanting to get revenge on the pastors son you were involved with than healthily dealing with what happened. Surely this happened some years ago if he’s married with a child now. What are you going to achieve by bringing it up to his parents? They probably won’t change their opinion on him, but could make life difficult for you. Is it the current break up that has sent you into a spiral?
If you want to find a new church, then just miss the odd service and visit some other places till you find somewhere that’s a better fit. If you’re meant to be doing things for the church, it’s ok to say you can’t make it or are stepping down from a team. Leaving doesn’t need to be a big announcement or scandal.
I don’t think you can blame all your current issues on the pastors son though, and talking to a therapist outside of religion would be helpful to work out why you put up with all his bullshit in the first place.