Therapy will definitely help. And while being alone is scary, this relationship is really damaging you. I think your partner knows you are scared to be alone and is using that to control you, make you constantly work to please him. I think you’ll be happier if you end things.
I remember feeling very lonely after my previous relationship ended, and scared that I would never find another life partner. Here are some things I did to help ease my loneliness. Maybe some of them will work for you.
* I started making more effort to make plans with friends.
* I started pet-sitting through rover.com. Animals are great company and the money was a nice extra. If you are in a position to do so, you could also foster or adopt a pet.
* I did some volunteer work. It’s a great way to meet people and have a feeling of purpose.
* I started thinking about all the small things that brought me joy and making time to do them. Lounging around on a weekend morning drinking coffee and reading a good book. Listening to my favorite music. Taking long walks. Watching the movies and TV shows *I* wanted to watch.
* I got regular exercise, which was good for both my physical and mental health.
* I started planning a trip just for myself, somewhere I wanted to go and where I wouldn’t have to compromise a single thing for another person’s preferences.
Ironically, not long after I started doing all this and enjoying a rich and fulfilling life, I started dating the man I’m now engaged to. It’s a very healthy relationship because we were both content with our single lives so we aren’t dependent on each other. We don’t stay because we’re scared to leave, we stay because we truly want to be here and bring each other a lot of happiness. You deserve to be with someone who makes you feel very happy.
I hope you take some time to make yourself the top priority in your life.