Reply To: Prolonging the inevitable

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October 9, 2023 at 10:54 am #1126051

My worst breakup was in my 20s at a point where I was moving around a bit for work… I had no real support system nearby and I know how much that sucks. I recommend the following:

– Reach out to the friends you neglected. Apologize. True friends will understand and still be in your corner.
– Reach out to good friends who don’t live nearby. My biggest supporter during the breakup I referenced was a good, trusted friend who lived in a different country.
– Find ways to add to your life. I say this as someone who is childfree and spends her time doing exactly what she wants when she wants, but volunteering, signing up for class or workshop, or picking up a new hobby are all great options. Especially if there’s a social component to it. Creative pursuits are supposed to have similar benefits to meditation. Maybe as a parent you can sign up for something with your daughter or be involved with her school or something.
– Take good care of yourself physically. Eat well, move your body, get some fresh air and sunshine when you can. Or, at least, do your best. I know sometimes sadness can knock us down to the point where it’s hard to do the things we know we should do to feel our best, but as long as you’re trying.
– It sounds like you’re still living together(?), but I really recommend going no contact as soon as you are able.
– Stay in therapy.

Breakups are really hard, but it gets easier. You just keep putting one foot in front of the other and giving yourself grace during through the difficult moments. Good luck!