Totally agree with Kate. I don’t think what he said was mean. Saying his wife is his priority isn’t mean, it’s the truth. It’s just truth you don’t like / didn’t want to hear.
Definitely therapy to work through why you hung on for so long instead of completely blocking and cutting ties, especially once you found out he was married.
FWIW, I’ve been there. While the guy I was seeing at the time wasn’t married, he never had any intention of really dating me. He’d make comments similar to this guy, letting me know what he had going wasn’t serious or long-term. Yet, I had this fantasy in my head that it would work out. It didn’t. And it did take therapy to work through why I let this happen to myself, why I was ok with scraps. I’m happily married now to someone who I completely trust and who loves me unconditionally.
I think a lot of us can relate.