Reply To: Overbearing MIL and Her Single Daughter

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November 25, 2023 at 2:19 pm #1126794

If you want to include your parents at every gathering, and always exclude his mom and sister, then that’s utterly unfair. Even if you don’t like his family, he has a right to share the holidays with them.

However, a compromise like “we do Christmas with your family this year, and mine next year” would be reasonable. Or even, “Let’s not have any extended family for this Thanksgiving and just cook for us and the kids.” Also, why are you always hosting? Can’t someone else take the reins for a holiday or two?

Also, does your husband share the work of hosting all these people? Does he do half the cooking, or does he clean up if you cook? I’m wondering if your resentment is entirely due to these family members or if it’s more of your husband’s expectation that you do the work for all family members, yours AND his.

But as Anonymousse noted above, this is something you have to work out with your husband, with the goal of both of you getting what you want at least some of the time, and neither of you shouldering all the work.