Reply To: I asked my daughter on Thanksgiving why she didn’t tell me she’s no longer vegan

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_s_
November 25, 2023 at 8:02 pm #1126820

“What is the “long story why” she dined with you via zoom? Seems like that might be a pertinent issue?”

Absolutely. There is obviously much more to this situation than captured in this short letter. Like others have said, you need to give your daughter room to breathe and start enjoying adult life, and you and your wife should consider seeing a therapist about why her not volunteering every detail of her life to you and not calling you back immediately has you both crying yourselves to sleep every night. *That’s* what’s not normal. Her making dietary and work choices for herself without immediately telling you is totally normal. She has told you you are difficult to communicate with and judgemental. We strangers see that in this letter you have written, even though you have written it to make yourself sound like you are in the right. A therapist can help you understand why your daughter feels this way and give you advice on how to better understand and communicate with her.

I love my mom, she was and is a great mom, and yet there are things she doesn’t know about me even though we have a good relationship and she has always been supportive of my life choices (even if she may not understand them). And I do not always answer the phone when she calls or return her calls immediately simply because I know she is a chatterbox and the call we be long, so I need to make sure I have the time and headspace to devote a long phone call (I hate talking on the phone in general, and I think many “kids today” feel that way too). And guess what, all of this is perfectly normal.