Reply To: I asked my daughter on Thanksgiving why she didn’t tell me she’s no longer vegan

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Nicki
November 26, 2023 at 9:07 am #1126827

She may not be telling Dad everything she’s thinking the moment she’s thinking it (which, BTW, is not something anyone should ever be expected to do in any kind of relationship), but she is telling him a LOT. She moved out of the house, separated herself from the family business, did not attend Thanksgiving in person, specifically asked (super intrusive mom) not to share information she acquired by snooping, and then very clearly said that Dad’s reactions to information that doesn’t conform with his worldview are upsetting to her. That’s a ton of information. Perhaps Dad should lean into what she HAS told him. And perhaps Dad should start from a place of believing that what she’s saying is true. Stop the interrogations, be grateful for whatever parts of her life she shares with her parents, and, if she’s open to it, ask her to share examples of situations where YOUR behavior has been inappropriate and has caused her to set the boundaries she clearly has set. And then…without reacting, justifying, or explaining, take time on your own with that information to do some work on your behavior. This is on you sir. Time to do some difficult, introspective work. And perhaps some counseling…which will only work if you are transparent and honest with your therapist.