I’m not seeing what is at all overbearing about a single mother (you don’t mention a FIL) or sister wanting or even expecting to be included in holiday meals. How is that ‘centered around’ her? You are cool to have your two parents included but are ‘sick of’ having to include two members of your husband’s family? For many people, the whole point of the holidays is to bring family members together, but apparently you don’t like her because she’s loud and wants to see her kids on the holidays. Hardly a cardinal sin. You aren’t presenting anything here that remotely supports your position that your husband’s family of origin is the problem. If the MIL and SIL live close to your home, outside of deciding to travel on holidays, you aren’t going to be able to elegantly exclude them without hurting your husband.