Reply To: TacoTuesday here.

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December 14, 2023 at 4:06 pm #1127101

“I don’t want to send a letter and be done with it because that seems like the cowardly way out. I want to say it verbally, whether over the phone or in their face. And not to get any certain reaction out of them–especially not an apology or “explanation”–but it feels like the truest thing to do FOR ME.”

Who said to send a letter?

People getting away from their abusive a family usually don’t make an announcement or send a letter…they just take some time. And when your mom or dad call, you tell them you’re taking space because he is a weird dad, and then you can tell them how he’s weird, if you want.

Because you’re adamant that you need to do this, in a non cowardly way, I am also getting the sense that this is a big dramatic moment for you of catharsis…where in reality you should be getting this out with a licensed therapist who specializes in incest or family trauma.

You are sounding like the girlfriend who is not at all ready to leave her toxic codependent relationship but wants a big blowout fight to see if he really loves her, or something. Yeah, you can tell me I’m full of shit but I have a pretty good bullshit detector.

Anyway, you asked what Kate wants, I can’t speak for Kate but we, a collective we as advice givers, are getting pretty tired of the multiple posts, usernames, details, lies, etc. Actually be honest. Reddit moderators have a lot more to moderate but they will ban you faster than Kate has called out your BS once they notice you posting from the same IP again and again. They will save your IP, add yours to the list to watch and if they notice any crap from you, your IP won’t be allowed to access the subreddit. Banned for good.