Reply To: “My Boyfriend Keeps Failing His Classes, I Don’t Know What To Do”

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December 27, 2023 at 11:07 am #1127300

Do schools not kick people out for persistent failure anymore? The universities I went to did, so I don’t understand how someone can fail all their classes and still be allowed back. But I’m also “old” so things might have changed.

Anyway, while I think his grades aren’t any of your business and don’t really understand why you’ve fallen into this dynamic of kind of mothering him over them, you’re not shallow for breaking up with him over it. Not to mention, even if he was a stellar, motivated student, life often takes college sweethearts in different directions these days.

Lastly, if you aren’t already in therapy, I think you should be. I don’t think you should be this obsessed and anxious about your boyfriend’s grades, and suspect that’s just the tip of your anxiety iceberg. And I say all of this to you as someone who was absolutely plagued with anxiety the closer I inched to “the real world.” I knew there was no blueprint to follow after graduation and that terrified me. I wanted to cling to what I knew, and what I knew was my long-term bf with whom I’d talked about being together 4eva, but increasingly couldn’t see it happening anymore. We parted ways not long after graduation. Very sad at the time, absolutely the right move for both of us. Being in school can be a lot of fun, but there are very real stressors that come with that time period in life.