Right, two things about men: 1) when they say they haven’t been close/intimate with their wife in years, they are trying to have sex with you, 2) if their actions don’t match their words, look at their actions for the truth. He says “friends,” he says he doesn’t see you in a sexual way, but he tries to put his foot up your shorts (gross!) and grabs your ass.
I think you DO understand these things, but you want to gaslight yourself into believing it’s just a friendship because you want to hang out with him because you’re lonely / he feeds your ego. Is that accurate?