Reply To: I cannot tell if this is a green flag or the reddest flag ever.

I’m in general agreement that dating a man who is actively learning how to treat women with respect sounds like a lot of work, but if LW’s perception of him is mostly based on what she’s found doing a deep creep of his socials and an answer to a pointed book club question, I’m not sure he’s pandering. Why not just ask him out, get to know him, and decide if he’s problematic or too much of a work in progress by YOUR standards, LW? One or even a few dates with someone is low stakes and if he gives you the ick, you’ll at least stop crushing.