Reply To: “I Expect More Sex From My Wife of 15 Years”

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HeartsMum
April 10, 2024 at 9:37 am #1128798

Prognosti-gator, “unless you’re cutting the grass with your dick” had me laughing so hard my hysterectomy scar hurt. Thanks for trying to get through.
Shemp, So, you’re angry that you’re a member of a group trapped in a social construct in which other groups have all the power? Yet for the vast majority of human history and present-day population, women have been stuck in a social construct NOT of their own making (same for disabled, LGBT+, Black & AAPI people). They’re too busy doing all the work to carve out a life within the limits others imposed, and/or break down the social constructs limiting them, to sit around grousing. The social construct you’re moaning about makes a wife not only (as you believe it should) a source of on-demand intercourse but is also a man’s fast track to family, community, belonging and longer life. if you don’t want to do the work to pull down that social construct, which is housework, emotional labour, personal growth, networking, then just go back to my original a) b) c) options. Prognosti-gator reminded me of a Sylvia Plath quote, “A woman is not a vending machine where you put kindness in and sex falls out”. My own conventional marriage vows did not say lie back and open your legs like clockwork, but they did say “love, honour, and cherish”. If you honoured your marriage vows in the latter regard, you might find that sex did “fall out”. I suspect that you don’t want to leave the nicely organised life you have but you would quite like a bit more sex. At which point, you may need to take on board what the people here have had to say. Or go for option c) the bushes.