It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great that being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go.
That your boyfriend is 35 and you’re only 21 is already suspicious. That he continues to follow 2-3 naked women on IG each week despite your expressed insecurity, telling you it’s “just for entertainment,” is another clue the guy is sleazy. Do yourself a favor and dodge this bullet before you get hit. In other words: MOA.
It doesn’t sound like he’s fighting that hard, OR that you are putting up much resistance if you’re staying at his place two to three times a week. You caught him in bed with another woman. How can it be spelled out any more clearly for you? You aren’t the only person he’s sleeping with. Get yourself tested and MOA. Four months is a long enough time to pretend to be broken up. Just break up for real and start the healing process. If you actually stay away, you’ll probably be over him by Christmas.
Your boyfriend gave your friend money to buy herself a gift from him and it’s the pizza dinner that’s pushing you over the edge? Really? Either way, just tell him you’re not comfortable with him buying your friend gifts (including pizza) and that, in the future, you’d prefer the two of you give gifts to your friends together, from both of you, or that he not give your friends gifts at all without clearing it with you first. And that goes double for pizza dinners.
If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org.