It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in three sentences or less, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. Today we discuss popping the question, singles night for a not-so-single guy, and one’s celebrity allow list.
You should take him to the justice of the peace and tell him you’re getting married and if he says no, you should say, “Well, why the hell not? We’ve been together for 15 years, married and divorced already, have two kids together, and your mom lives with us!” And if he still says no, go home and live your life and be happy your kids get to enjoy living with both parents who, although not married, have a good relationship.
It’s not normal for a partnered person to go to an event where the sole purpose is to meet singles. If he wants to hang with his single friends, I’m sure there are other activities that don’t raise eyebrows as much as this. But then again, “Discos and Drinking” does sound pretty fun, so maybe you should tag along with him and let everyone know your guy is taken.
Telling you she things some random guy looks “yummy” is weird and you should tell her it makes you uncomfortable and ask her to stop. The celebrity thing is something everyone does, right? I mean, don’t you have a “list”? I do! There’s Ryan Gosling, yum, yum, yum. And James Franco, hello. And Lenny Kravitz, hubba, bubba. Brad Pitt still does for me, Missouri pride. Javier Bardem, Hola! And, dear God, I’m so ashamed, but if I were 15 years younger: Nick Jonas. Sick, right? But, mark my words, give him another ten years and ol’ boy’s gonna be freakin’ hot.
Who’s on YOUR list??
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