Update: So, this is embarrassing; it seems I have answered the same three letters from last week’s shortcuts. And I even re-edited them and answered them a little differently and didn’t realize I was answering the same damn letters! Clearly, I was distracted this week (in addition to my grandfather’s death, there were some other distractions and stresses). Everything is fine and I will be back to normal next week, but I’m sorry for the repeat performance today.
It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go.
No, it’s not “fate” that you texted your ex so much you ended up back in the sack with him. And you don’t “love your boyfriend to death,” or you wouldn’t be cheating on him. Get real with yourself, get real with your boyfriend, and then cut him loose so you have the freedom to text and sext and whatever else it is you need in order to feel like number one.
To be honest, I think your husband’s a big ol’ liar. If you have kids or have been together a long time, it might be worth trying therapy to see if you can save the marriage. If it’s just the two of you or if the marriage is still pretty young, I’d cut your losses and move on. This man is probably cheating on you, definitely lying to you, and likely has some issues he needs to work through before he can be a good partner to anyone.
I think if you’re concerned about your boyfriend going on a business trip because you’re afraid he’s going to cheat on you, you probably shouldn’t be marrying the guy. Let him go… in more ways than one.
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If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at firstname.lastname@example.org.