Welcome back to work, all you Americans AND CANADIANS WHO ALSO CELEBRATED LABOR DAY YESTERDAY!! If you didn’t check in to DW yesterday, you missed a whole day of dirty, dirty secrets that have now been deleted. And what happens on deleted DW threads stays on deleted DW threads, although I think the meme about ignorant Americans not knowing the federal holidays of every other country will stick around, and I HOPE the meme about sex with no regard also sticks around for a while.
Anyhoo, if you were away from us yesterday you missed my announcement that I am starting a DW newsletter, which will go out twice a week (first one will go out Thursday) and you can sign up for it right over there on the right in that cute little box —>.
Go ahead, go sign up. You’ll find out who “wins” Comment of the Day, plus receive exclusive content not available on the site, like relationship tips, inspirational messages and quotes, and notes from yours truly. You’ll also get 51 tips for happy relationships. Plus, you’ll receive discount codes for products and services I’ll be offering in the near future. Oh yes, there will be products and services. And you’ll be the first to find out about them if you sign up for the newsletter.
OK, that’s enough of the hard sell. Now, let’s get back to some letters and advice, shall we?
JK September 4, 2012, 8:48 am
Awesome, Wendy. And yes, I hope those memes stick around as well. 🙂
Fabelle September 4, 2012, 8:51 am
Nooo, I missed the deleted thread! 🙁
Caris September 4, 2012, 9:31 pm
i saved it >.>
Jess September 4, 2012, 9:01 am
Done and done.
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:09 am
I forgot there was going to be comments of the week. That alone makes it worth it. That was one of my favorite things.
JK September 4, 2012, 9:11 am
We all know it´s going to be AP every time. 😀
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:21 am
I get stage fright. Now that Wendy’s highlighting good comments, only shitty, shitty things will spew from my mouth. Unless of course IWTTS starts up again with her “fiscally responsible Republicans” nonsensical balogna. Kidding, let’s not go there.
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:26 am
Haha. You silly democrats. 🙂
But JK – it’s totally going to be addie all the time. Either that or WD commenting on how awesome Addie is.
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:27 am
We’ve officially made WD a thing right?
JK September 4, 2012, 9:31 am
Of course!!! You know how much I love abbreviations.
rachel September 4, 2012, 9:46 am
Wait, who’s WD?
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:49 am
rachel September 4, 2012, 9:50 am
Oh, right! WD is awesome!
Wendy September 4, 2012, 9:57 am
rachel September 4, 2012, 9:58 am
And you should go see the Stones!
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:09 am
It is killing me to have to work today. K I L L I N G M E. It’s not fair. I hate it. Like, what’s the point? The day is S O L O N G — and the work week? E V E N L O N G E R. It’s not fair that we can’t just spend this time before we inevitably die with the ones we love, just hugging tight and whispering sweet nothings and eating brie and drinking red wine and then hugging tighter, and tighter still. It’s not fair. I can think of nothing that pains me more than sitting in this office, alone, listening to IP atty Bob’s speaker phone conference through my wall, knowing it’s barely 8 am, and I still have to get through the E N T I R E day before life can begin. I’m so B L U E. I think I should quit my job. It’s just not conducive to life.
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:11 am
By conducive to life do you mean conducive to days long dates with texterMctextsalot?
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:35 am
Demain, dès l’aube, à l’heure où blanchit la campagne,
Je partirai. Vois-tu, je sais que tu m’attends.
J’irai par la forêt, j’irai par la montagne.
Je ne puis demeurer loin de toi plus longtemps.
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:41 am
Today is the W O R S T day of my life. I can’t function. I think I need to take a sick day. I feel faint. I feel, I feel, I feel so …. S A D. I mean, Mondays are so lonely. I’m all alone in this office and I have to stay here for like 8 hours. EIGHT HOURS. I want to die.
JK September 4, 2012, 9:44 am
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:47 am
Oh thank God. That’s the best news I’ve heard all day.
bethany September 4, 2012, 9:23 am
I hear you… It’s so depressing. I wish I could retire already.
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:55 am
I’m so depressed. It’s not even 9 am where I live. And all I want is to be tucked in bed, read to, with my hair gently stroked, a warm body laying next to me, with our legs intertwined, oh and maybe a breakfast burrito too with salsa – that sounds really good right now. BRB.
jlyfsh September 4, 2012, 9:27 am
I so agree AP. I just want to take my dogs to the beach every day and bake cookies and take naps on the couch while my husband watches football. Why can’t someone pay me to do that??
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:30 am
YES! I don’t even want to be a stay at home mom – I want to be a stay at home wife, haha.
Either that or my dream would be to make a full time salary but work part time. I seriously think I would be more efficient at my job if I only had to work 4 hours a day. That would be perfect for me. Then I would still have time to run, go to yoga, cook, drink wine, paint, visit friends, have a perfectly clean house, etc.
rachel September 4, 2012, 9:46 am
Yeah, I’m much more productive in small doses…like the last hour of the day when I realized I haven’t gotten anything done.
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:44 am
And why shouldn’t you, jlyfsh! I dream of a world where we can take dogs to the beach every day and cuddle all night. Let’s start a movement! Seriously, I don’t know if you heard but we all eventually die. Every single one of us. And then you die and you’re dead for a long time. We need to make the most of life. We need to treat each other kindly because in the end we all die and we need to surround ourselves with those we love because they will die too. I need a hug sooooo bad.
JK September 4, 2012, 9:46 am
Now you´ve made me depressed. Thanks.
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:51 am
No good can come from life. Just eternal disappointment — especially if we don’t take control and demand cuddle time. Because there is always SOMETHING – S O M E T H I N G – that tries to get in the way. Like, oh fuck me I have to go to work and then drop some things off in my storage unit — and the thought of that is KILLING ME. I don’t have time for that! I can’t do it anymore. WHOA IS ME.
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 9:48 am
Hahaha when I first read that I thought you said “we need to touch each other kindly”. Do you see the effect you’ve had on everyone’s brains?
rachel September 4, 2012, 9:56 am
Lol – that just put that Tenacious D song in my head… “I’m gonna screw you sweetly, I’m gonna hump you discreetly”
Amanda September 4, 2012, 9:42 am
I nominate AP for comment of the millenium. I wish I could go walk in the woods all day, fuck graduate work. I should have been a park ranger.
Addie Pray September 4, 2012, 9:46 am
You should!! You should be a park ranger. Do it, now. And find yourself a park ranger lover. Go park yourselves all over the range in bliss for eternity. Praise the lord.
MissDre September 4, 2012, 9:18 am
Wendy you spelled Labour wrong 😉 Same with colour and favourite and all the other words you weird Americans spell without U’s. LoL happy Tuesday!
JK September 4, 2012, 9:26 am
OMG a canadian with a sense of humour??? 😛
MissDre September 4, 2012, 9:27 am
LoL are we stereotyped otherwise? Although I admit, our TV does friggin suck.
JK September 4, 2012, 9:30 am
Not a stereotype (as far as I know), but some people try to make a whole nation look bad.
temperance September 4, 2012, 10:25 am
NO WAY! You made Trailer Park Boys! I mean, that has to make up for anything weird or boring, right?
Taylor September 4, 2012, 10:27 am
I really liked the Canadian TV show about the Russian chess master with agoraphobia stuck in a 5 star hotel investigating his wife’s death. I forget the title, but it got cancelled after 1 season, then picked up by hulu (where I devoured them), but they still decided not to make a second season. Very sad.
Taylor September 4, 2012, 10:27 am
bethany September 4, 2012, 9:22 am
Hahaha! Love your opening sentence!
Yesterday was fun!
GatorGirl September 4, 2012, 9:35 am
I wish I would have been here for the open thread! I was grocery shopping and cleaning the apartment. Super not fun way to spend my day off.
GatorGirl September 4, 2012, 3:37 pm
Wendy I just read the 51 tips and holy moly that is awesome. Hysterical and totally accurate.
XanderTaylor September 4, 2012, 11:50 am
I can’t sign up for the newsletter. When I hit join it is actually for submit & of course, I have not filled in any info so there is nothing to submit. Any suggestions?
Wendy September 4, 2012, 11:53 am
You have to fill in your email address in the space provided before you hit “join.”
XanderTaylor September 4, 2012, 1:05 pm
There is no space. The join is over it.
Wendy September 4, 2012, 1:18 pm
There should be a little box that says “Your email address here.” What browser are you using?
XanderTaylor September 4, 2012, 3:47 pm
Internet explorer. There is a box for an email address, however, the word join is over the box & it (the mean word join) won’t let me put in an address. Guess I will have to miss out. Sigh.
iwannatalktosampson September 4, 2012, 5:14 pm
Download Google Chrome. It’s soooooo much better than IE. All sorts of weird things were happening on DW when I used IE and now they’re all gone! It’s free and will change your life.
scattol September 4, 2012, 5:09 pm
So in case Americans want to broaden your horizons and celebrate everyone’s else’s national holidays: http://www.timeanddate.com/holidays/
Caris September 4, 2012, 9:37 pm
Temperance September 4, 2012, 10:31 pm
So, the open thread was GREAT FUN, but I realized afterward that I actually had a sex confession that wasn’t just my creepy Walter White fetish. SAVING IT FOR NEXT TIME.