Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Topic of the Day: Reentering the World

(Me, before my first post-vax night out. I’ve done my hair, but I don’t know what to wear).

Over on Medium the other day, writer, Will Leitch, wrote some helpful tips for reentering the world as we get vaccinated and begin to leave our cocoons again. Maybe you are feeling zero anxiety about said re-entrance (good for you!), or maybe the thought of being in groups of more than your cat and your spouse or partner or housemate gives you hives. Wherever you fall on the spectrum, I thought talking about the ways we’re reentering the world and the different feelings we have around this next phase of life would be helpful. Here’s how it’s going for me:

As a parent of kids who aren’t yet eligible for the vaccine and likely won’t be until the fall, my reentry into the world looks a little bit different than someone who has older kids or no kids at all (or, I guess, someone who isn’t too concerned about their kids getting Covid, which is a surprisingly large percentage of parents). Since getting vaccinated, there have been my solo experiences in the world, my experiences with Drew, and my still-limited-but-becoming-a-little-less-so experiences with the whole family.

Favorite post-vax solo experience: I finally used a gift certificate for a massage that I got for my birthday in SEPTEMBER and it was amazing! I didn’t have much anxiety about this at all, especially knowing my massage therapist was fully vaccinated as well, and I thoroughly enjoyed the experience and am looking forward to splurging on another massage in the next couple months. My massage therapist and I did chat more than I’ve chatted during massages in the past and I think that was probably because I was so excited to be in a room with another person whom I don’t live with. The massage therapist, to her credit, did not seem to mind (and also seemed pretty thrilled to be moving into post-vax reality). A++ – I would recommend!

Favorite post-vax couple experience: When our longtime babysitter, a 65-year-old grandmother who has watched my kids since Jackson was four months old, became eligible for the vaccine back in February, I called her the morning appointments opened and signed her up for her first shot the same week I got mine. She and Drew and I all became fully vaccinated at the same time, and so I felt comfortable having her babysit the kids so Drew and I could get out for our first night out together in 14 months. The kids were so thrilled to spend indoor time with someone other than us, and we were over-the-moon to be out, without them, among other adults who were also without children.

My biggest anxiety about the evening was what to wear. First, almost nothing I own fits me anymore after a year+ of carb-loading and lounging in sweats. Second, like, what do people even wear out these days? I don’t know! After trying on a bunch of stuff, I opted for all black (slimming!), including a pair of satin-y elastic waist pants that I dressed up with some heeled boots. I guess it worked okay, but I really need to add a few more options to my wardrobe if I’m going to continue doing more of this going out at night. I kept mentally taking notes on how people were dressed, and maybe it’s a symptom of being 44 or maybe I’m just out-of-touch after so much isolation, but I still don’t have a good handle on how to dress myself for anything other than, like, hanging out in a playground or on my couch, which is… sad, and something to work on.

We started the evening at our friends’ bar in Soho – sitting in the built-for-the-pandemic outdoor seating. Our friends, also just vaccinated, joined us for a bit and we caught up on how our year had been. It was really cathartic to talk with friends about how scary last spring was in NYC and how nervous we’ve been about kids going into school buildings (we’ve all kept our kids home) and when to hug again. I’m not even a big hugger and I missed hugging friends. I did notice that I talked a lot and wondered if I was being boring, but I’ll be honest: I had those same social anxieties before the pandemic, so I’m not sure the two are connected. At any rate, the anxiety eased as the evening – and the wine – progressed. All in all, I give this night out in the world a solid A- (the minus is for the sheer expense – babysitter fee, cab fare, dinner and drinks; it’s kind of a shock to the system to spend as much in one night as you’ve spent on take-out for the past month for your family of four).

Favorite post-vax family experience: Last week Drew and the kids and I took advantage of two out of four of us being vaccinated, and we made the cross-country flight to Missouri to see my fully-vaccinated parents for the first time in 15 months. I actually had a lot of anxiety about this experience because it involved risk for the kids that I wasn’t completely comfortable with. But weighing those risks – which are much lower now than they were just a few months ago – against the benefits as well as against the reality that it will likely be many months before the kids are fully vaccinated and I’m not sure waiting until then to see their only living grandparents is best (the grandparents coming to us wasn’t an option), it felt like a risk worth taking. We took lots of precautions both en route and while at my parents’, and I think we made a decision that was good for all of us. I’m not going to recommend everyone hop on a plane or go on a long-distance vacation with their unvaccinated kids – obviously, this is a personal decision and there are data and opinions and plenty of articles that support any choice you might make – but the joy it brought everyone in the family to be reunited again after such a long time was pretty great.

Next up, I’m taking two solo trips to reunite with friends I haven’t seen since before the pandemic. Both trips will be to places I’ve never visited before, and so I’m super excited not only to see long-lost friends (one of whom will be celebrating a 50th birthday), but also to experience new-to-me places as well. I have zero anxiety about these trips except… ugh, what should I wear? What do people wear to the beach these days (I’m kidding… sort of).

What about you? How have your re-entries into the world been going? Have you experienced any social anxiety?

52 comments… add one
  • Kate May 11, 2021, 11:15 am

    I recommend stretchy dresses!

    I had a terrible shock lol when I got on the scale for the first time in a couple years. I weigh 15 lbs more than I thought! My jeans and tops fit, but “going out” dresses don’t, it’s so weird. But fortunately a lot of dresses have stretch. I bought a few new ones.

    Also, I put my Fitbit back on and am actually moving as much and eating as little as I should be.

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    • Kate May 11, 2021, 11:46 am

      And I went out Friday night with a girl friend who’s fully vaccinated. It was so nice. We drank martinis and got drunk and we’re just both on the same page mentally. I needed that.

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    • ktfran May 11, 2021, 1:59 pm

      I had to go into the office a couple of weeks ago for laptop problems. I was tempted to stand on the scale in our mail room to see the covid wait… i didn’t. I should have.

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      • Kate May 11, 2021, 2:07 pm

        No reason to if all your shit fits. What set me off was I put on my Derby dress from 2019 and it was snug.

      • ktfran May 13, 2021, 8:52 am

        So, had to come into the office today for my first in-person strategy meeting. CRAZY!!!

        I weighed myself. I’m about 5-6 lbs heavier. All my clothes still fit though. Thank goodness. However, need to up the walking again.

    • Copa May 11, 2021, 4:12 pm

      Yeahhh, early in COVID, I think I lost weight. I didn’t weigh myself because I don’t jump on the scale often, but my clothes were a little looser. Then I got into baking every weekend and until January or so was making a lot of cocktails. I jumped on the scale in February for the first time in probably a year after noticing my jeans were snug and was up about 10 pounds. I’ve slowly lost about five pounds just being more mindful. It’s not great, but meh. Worse things happened during the pandemic.

      In my recent online order that arrived today, I finally found a pair of cutoff jean shorts that fit my muscular quads/hamstrings. This search has been going on for awhile, even when I was at a lower weight, so I feel like I’ve struck gold.

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      • Kate May 11, 2021, 4:26 pm

        I got into never moving from my desk except to stress eat hot Cheetos.

  • LisforLeslie May 11, 2021, 11:26 am

    I went to dinner, outside, Greek food. It was pretty good. I’m staying in Florida a little longer than expected*, but as Florida heats up it’s going to be harder for people to sit outside and dine. Almost everyone here is vaccinated and today we got news that one vaccinated person now has COVID. So it’s reminding people that if they want to see their younger grandchildren/great grandchildren, they better get the vaccine and maintain social distancing, etc.

    The card room opens up this week but many of the players are hesitant to go. And some fully admit (myself included) that the online version that helps you count and add the points is just easier and less carpal-tunnel-y.

    *Did you know that when you get older the muscles in your eyes can simply stop working for no freaking reason for a few months (I mean, sometimes there are reasons but in this case, my mom has no health issues like high blood pressure or diabetes) making it impossible to focus? Poor thing has to wear a patch so I’ve been walking around talking like a pirate and calling her the Sea Queen. So that’s fun.

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  • Copa May 11, 2021, 11:29 am

    I didn’t shop much during the pandemic. I’ve started buying some new items online to refresh my summer wardrobe after learning through TikTok that Gen Z thinks my clothes are uncool. Mostly kidding. But I have been looking for some straight leg jeans that aren’t ridiculous (haven’t found the right pair for me yet) and replacing old basics that aren’t in great shape anymore. Last year, I went into the spring thinking it’d be the year I did a bigger wardrobe refresh but that didn’t happen because I no longer had to be anywhere. I’ve never been a huge shopper, but have outgrown the style of a good chunk of my closet and have been selling things on Poshmark. It’s mostly stuff I bought in my 20s that I simply no longer reach for, but I even got an offer on a pair of low rise flare jeans from AE that I bought in high school or early college.

    I met my boyfriend’s friend who now lives in Austin for the first time over the weekend, we had him over for drinks. I didn’t feel uncomfortable to be meeting someone new, but he’s the first new person I’ve met in well over a year and I made a joke about it.

    I have a couple baby shower invites for this summer and we got a save the date for a fall wedding. Honestly one of the baby showers does give me a little social anxiety to think about because I wouldn’t know many people there, possibly none — something that wouldn’t have phased me much in the past.

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  • Fyodor May 11, 2021, 12:56 pm

    We had a houseguest a few weeks ago, which was fun. I had to fly to Cleveland to help my dad out with something-the plane was definitely anxiety inducing. While in Cleveland I got to visit some family friends, which was really nice. The Bride of Fyodor had some vaccinated coworkers over while I was gone. Nice little bits of normalcy.

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  • ktfran May 11, 2021, 1:07 pm

    Wendy, beach vacation = caftans! They’re pricey, but I’m obsessed w/ Emerson Fry caftans.

    We got back from our first vacation since the pandemic hit on Sunday. We desperately needed to burn PTO, we were going to max out in June. And we desperately needed to leave here. We were five weeks fully vax’d, seven since the prick on the day we left.

    I felt minor anxiety at our layover in Houston. Other than that, the trip was a success. The place we traveled to, you needed to show a negative test or your vax card upon entering. Most tourists we talked to were also vax’d. I will also say that the residents where we were much better about mask wearing than what I’ve seen here. I’m like, why can’t everyone be this way?!?

    As some of you probably saw, I posted some pics on IG. I was hesitant, but decided I wanted to mostly because all of the people who served us were SO HAPPY to have customers again. They were so friendly and thankful and so we were, I hope our tips showed that. I think it’s important to start lifting up the economy again, especially in the service industry.

    Of course, we don’t have children, so what we do would def look different than others.

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    • Dear Wendy May 11, 2021, 1:51 pm

      I saw some of your pics. looked like an amazing trip!

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  • MaterialsGirl May 11, 2021, 1:44 pm

    Wendy, let me recommend “CUPSHE” for some swimsuits. I bought this one for the body I currently have (and breastfeeding) It’s actually super flattering and cheap.

    Let’s see, post-vaccination, we had my husband’s parents up from MO and my 90 year old Gramma over for Easter.. then they came back a few weeks later as I had an emergency appendectomy (ugh, there went all my post-partum core progress). We also had a parent’s night away at a hotel and dinner at Schwa and late night drinks at Estelles. I went 110% and paid for that one!

    No set plans for a trip just yet, since we’re mostly just visiting family we haven’t seen in too long. Our 5th anniversary is in June, so we will do dinner, but maybe take a trip to Asheville in the fall?

    While we’ve been middle of the road risk-wise throughout the past year plus, it is weird reentering society without double thinking (essential workers so we still went to the plant/babysitter then daycare). When we’ve had multiple events on our social calendar in a week, I get a little anxious. Not so much for risk, more because I’m not used to it. Social interaction takes energy! A good reminder going forward for myself is to avoid cramming too many things into a weekend. Allow time for the spontaneous and for some home-bound activities too.

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    • Dear Wendy May 11, 2021, 1:51 pm

      Thanks for the swimsuit rec!

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      • MaterialsGirl May 11, 2021, 1:57 pm

        just a warning, their return policy is a little interesting, but you can often find a lot of their stuff on FB marketplace for that reason. Another mom friend has trouble finding suits that cover her booty, but was successful with these. I actually think this cheapo swimsuit looks way better than the $125 “super slimming” one i bought a few years ago.

        A) Cupshe Coupon
        130% of the actual amount you paid for the items you would like to return. Meanwhile, you get to keep your purchased products on hand without returning them.

        B) Preferential refund​
        70% refund of the actual amount you paid for the items you would like to return. Meanwhile, you get to keep your purchased products on hand without returning them.

        C) Full refund
        Just send out the product (Not washed or damaged) to the address below within the next 7 days. Besides, please email us the tracking number for Return package and a photo of the shipping receipt. Please take note that we don’t offer shipping label at present and you will need to pay the shipping fee for return.

      • Kicia May 12, 2021, 10:10 am

        Another recommendation for Cupshe! Although I always order through Amazon since returns are easier. I believe it’s the same prices as their website.

  • Miss MJ May 11, 2021, 2:16 pm

    We’ve been going out for dinner for the last several weeks pretty regularly. It was weird at first, but now we’re pretty comfortable with it, even though we do go at non-busy times if we can’t be outside. And we’ve been to vaccinated friends’ houses, as well. Haven’t been to a theater or music event yet, though.

    I also have no idea what to really wear anymore. Most of my spring and summer dresses still fit, covid weight be damned, and I’ve been wearing those, which is fine, but I look around at the newer styles of clothing and I am just … not inspired.

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  • Miel May 11, 2021, 2:21 pm

    My husband and I are going to a fancy/Michelin star chef/tasting menu-type restaurant on Friday, and I’m trying to be excited and positive about it. We are fully vaccinated, and apparently 50% of adults in our city are also fully vaccinated, but I still can’t stop feeling anxious when we’ve been indoor with strangers in the last few weeks. I’m constantly noticing “this woman is not wearing her mask”, “this party of 8 obviously isn’t living together”, “well, these tables are not 6 feet apart”, and I’m really trying to think positively about our upcoming dinner. I’m trying to remind myself that I’m protected, and that I should enjoy my first date night as a married couple without spending all my time judging other people I know nothing about.

    But yeah, woohoo, last year we cooked our own dinner on our wedding day because all restaurants were closed. Since then, the few times we’ve eaten out, it was the type of place where the bill comes to $35 for two. I can’t wait to dress up and eat amazing food!

    But also, the holes in my ears have closed up because I haven’t worn earrings in a year! Ooops!!

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    • Dear Wendy May 11, 2021, 4:53 pm

      My ears started closing up last spring, a couple months into quarantine, and so I made an effort to start wearing earrings at least a couple times a week.

      Enjoy your night out with your husband! The vaccine works really well and the likelihood of you getting covid is super super slim. Being out will start to feel less and less weird the more you do it (and the more cases continue to drop!). Have fun – you deserve it!

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  • Bittergaymark May 11, 2021, 9:35 pm

    I’ve been running. So my weight is in check.

    Fascinating about the earring holes closing up. I never knew that could happen.

    I have been doing outdoor happy hours the past month at my favorite place across the street. Think once a week… Figaro the French Bistro on Vermont has a killer happy hour here in Los Feliz.

    But going out still feels strange and wonky. Getting used to it, but it takes time.

    I rode the subway last week as I am doing the interior design on a condo downtown. That was a bit unsettling. Crowded. More — LA is overrun by the mentally ill homeless. Like I get yelled at by somebody who only half sees me damn near every other time I leave my apartment. Yeah… LA looks … fucking rough. It’s unsettling. Very.

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  • Kate May 12, 2021, 10:36 am

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    • ktfran May 12, 2021, 11:24 am

      Loved the “back to school” analogy in that piece. That’s exactly what it feels like right now.

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    • Dear Wendy May 12, 2021, 12:17 pm

      But I’m still left not knowing wtf to wear!

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      • Kate May 12, 2021, 12:57 pm

        I know, but it kind of helps you understand why you don’t, and that you’re not alone.

        Plug for Haverdash, the rental clothing company that sends me 3 things a week… it helps me try new styles without commitment, and if I want to buy them, they are discounted because they may have been pre-worn, though of course cleaned and sanitized.

        And I mean, everyone is right about the Chinese swimsuits you can get on Amazon, I know you hate Amazon but they have great swimsuits. And for going out, it’s almost summer, wear dresses! There are so many that are comfortable and will fit your body now as well as later if you lose weight from moving more.

      • ktfran May 12, 2021, 1:28 pm

        I’ve considered doing Trunk Club to get some new clothes. I’ll check out Haverdash.

        I wouldn’t worry so much about trends right now. I’d stick with some classic cuts while things are still in flux. Dresses would be so easy!!

        I’m also seeing a lot of linen. More so than other years.

      • ktfran May 12, 2021, 1:33 pm

        Oh and if you’re looking for some inspiration, Girls of a Certain Age is one of the sites I check for fashion ideas. I also check out Atlantic-Pacific, which is crazy and over the top and I never buy anything from any of her links, but I like the color combos, etc.

      • Kate May 12, 2021, 1:33 pm

        Haverdash sent me a linen-y dress (but it doesn’t get wrinkly) that looked kind of boring but is very cute on, for going out. It has a cutout in back that’s more like a vent at your lower back, and makes it fit more flatteringly through the waist. My husband complimented it a lot and I felt cute in it so I bought it. For like $15!

      • ktfran May 12, 2021, 1:36 pm

        Kate, that’s a WIN!

      • Copa May 12, 2021, 2:10 pm

        I came this close to trying Haverdash in March 2020. Glad I didn’t pull the trigger at the time, but since I do have a couple baby showers I may go to on the horizon and a short bday getaway with the boyfriend next month, it might be nice to have some no- or low-commitment dresses as options.

      • Kate May 12, 2021, 2:14 pm

        I’ve been getting it all through the pandemic. It’s $59 a month and you get as many as 12 things. I have to be on zoom all the time and it’s a dressy company, so I appreciate the blouses and sweaters and dresses!

      • Copa May 12, 2021, 2:40 pm

        Pre-pandemic, I used to go to work events fairly regularly that ranged from smart casual to black tie and everything in between. RTR was great for black tie, but I thought Haverdash might be a solution for some events and everyday work wear. While I WFH, I’m happy enough to be rotating the tops I own with leggings, but as we head into summer, I have the itch for new-to-me clothes. I also generally like the idea of having new things to wear while buying less.

        One of my coworkers has several floor-length gowns that she rotates for any black tie events. I also want to look put together but I don’t particularly care to buy a new outfit every time I need to meet a certain dress code for work.

  • Hazel May 12, 2021, 2:15 pm

    I always go for vintage and second hand, ( I enjoy the search) and as none of my sources have been open, I have been perusing online. Perusing far too much, given that chances of me going anywhere anytime soon are slim, (but I’m not right now) though that does give me the excuse that I may need some looser things. And my local dress agency who also carries vintage and posts online does need the support….

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  • bondgirl May 12, 2021, 2:59 pm

    TBH, I only sort of retreated back indoors when covid cases were rising…only main difference now is we’re dining out again and our friends are finally comfortable meeting up for happy hours. I’ve been playing indoor/outdoor sports, as local state restrictions have allowed, since the summer. Neither my husband nor I ever got sick (several negative covid tests AND negative for antibodies), but now we’re both fully vaccinated and ready to not have any more restrictions!

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  • Vathena May 12, 2021, 10:16 pm

    My 2/3 fully post-vax household (2 adults vaxxed, one non-eligible kid) adventures: Went to Trader Joe’s for the first time in 14 months. It almost brought me to tears of joy, even though there was That One Betch walking around with her mask under her chin while she yapped into her phone. Scheduled a repair for our washing machine – they came and looked at it, charged a bunch of money, and now a month later we’re still waiting on a part. Whatever! My MIL visited, and it was lovely. My mom is coming next week (after first stopping off to see my brother, SIL, and little nephews in anti-vax trump country…I am trying not to freak out about that. All the adults are vaxxed, but still.) I went for a pap smear and a dental cleaning. I have appointments for a skin cancer screening, haircut, and leg wax. We are planning a cross-country road trip to visit family this summer, and hopefully attend a wedding. Our community case rates have plummeted, with almost 60% of our 16+ population having at least partial vaccination, and our kiddo is in school in person 2 days per week. She is signed up for 4 weeks of camp this summer, small groups/masked, but we may pull her if the vaccine rates slow and/or community spread ticks up. I am cautiously optimistic about school in the fall, but much remains to be seen. I can’t WAIT until younger kids can be vaccinated!

    I also am befuddled by the clothing in my closet, much of which I haven’t worn in a year. I bought a couple of tops from Boden, but otherwise I can’t figure out what I like or need anymore. I quit Stitch Fix and Trunk Club in 2019 because it felt like they didn’t really get me. I do have some straight-leg jeans from AG that fit pretty well. My issue with them is that sometimes I feel like they look weird with certain shoes…? like, my skinny jeans look better with most of my shoes? Is that a thing or is it just me?

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    • Dear Wendy May 13, 2021, 9:24 am

      You’re doing a lot of the activities post-vax that I’m doing too, including a washing machine repair which turned into needing to buy a brand new one. Skin cancer screening is next week for me. My kids are signed up for three weeks of day camp this summer, respectively, and I’m keeping fingers super crossed that cases continue to decline – or at least not reverse course and begin to climb again – before then since we still can’t get the younger ones vaccinated and I remain anxious about their well-being.

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    • ktfran May 13, 2021, 9:36 am

      Vathena – I have the same issues w/ you in that I don’t like how some straight legged jeans look with some of my shoes and I don’t have that problem w/ skinny jeans. Like, I don’t like straight legged w/ boots or sneakers, but I’m ok w/ flats or heels. On me, of course. I don’t really notice it on others.

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      • Kate May 13, 2021, 11:27 am

        I think if they are cropped and show some ankle, they look good with boots and sneakers. If they’re falling over your shoe, that’s tougher.

      • ktfran May 13, 2021, 11:37 am

        Agreed. Cropped or appropriately rolled up. I haven’t searched for those yet, but am finally considering it.

      • Vathena May 13, 2021, 12:05 pm

        Yeah, but then you get to us shorter-legged ladies, and how we’ve been told that cropped pants make us look shorter and wider – remember how capris were in for a hot minute, and then the fashion gods were like, NEVERMIND, MORTALS, YOU LOOK STUPID IN THOSE TAKE THEM OFF RIGHT NOW. So I am confused that now I am supposed to be like, rolling up my pants or buying shorter ones? Plus having cold ankles in the winter because isn’t the purpose of boots to keep you warm…? What do I know, I’m just 40, frumpy, and surviving here, lol.

        I am dying to have a pedicure, but will wait on that service a little bit longer! My husband and I ate lunch on a large, well-spaced restaurant patio when our daughter was at school a couple of weeks ago, and that was lovely. I don’t think I’ll be eating indoors anywhere until after my kid is vaxxed.

      • Kate May 13, 2021, 12:56 pm

        I am short, I’m 5’4” with a long torso. So I buy petite jeans, and the high waisted ones make my legs look longer. You can absolutely wear a cropped jean if you’re short! And then you wear a sneaker in warmer weather or an ankle boot in cooler weather. Your whole ankle doesn’t stick out but there’s a little space between the top of your boot and bottom of the cuff. If the jeans are really long and you roll them too many times they won’t look good. You need to buy “ankle” or “cropped” or petite, with an inseam of like 27.

      • Kate May 13, 2021, 12:57 pm

        They look good with sandals too!

      • Kate May 13, 2021, 2:20 pm

        Just remembered, the problem with Capris is they cut you off at a wide part of your calf. Same reason I don’t like skirts that length on me. An ankle jean just shows the slimmest part of your leg, the ankle. That’s why it’s flattering and cute.

    • LisforLeslie May 13, 2021, 11:42 am

      For the first time in my life I’m ahead of the curve on jeans style. About 2 years ago I bought a pair of high waisted, wide leg jeans with a tie belt. Super comfy. Bought a second pair early last year just in case the first pair died.

      I have worn these jeans every single day through pandemic. Because my work from home rules have not changed (must wear bra, must wear pants with button).

      I shipped most of my clothing back to NY when I was planning to leave Florida. When it was clear I was staying longer I bought some new shirts (and it took forever to find anything that was remotely appealing). They came last night. They’re cute. My mom is just happy to not see the same 5 shirts.

      Still not ready to go to TJ Maxx though.

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  • allathian May 14, 2021, 1:05 am

    My husband and I have had our first shots and we’ll have our second ones in the summer (to ensure a high first-shot coverage, shots are given 12 weeks apart). Apart from 2 months last year, my son’s been in school all this time (daycares and elementary schools were open, middle and high schools and colleges and universities were remote) because he’s not high risk and none of us are immunocompromised. In my country, there’s been a handful of cases of children being hospitalized for Covid and no deaths in the under-20 cohorts.

    I’m so comfortable now just being at home all the time. I don’t miss going to restaurants or to the movies at all, and I definitely don’t miss going to the office. My employer had a liberal WFH policy even before the pandemic, which I didn’t really take advantage of much because our son had to be taken to school. But now that he’s old enough and confident enough to go by himself, and my job mostly involves writing by myself rather than collaborating with my coworkers, I don’t really care if I never go to the office again, except for the occasional process development brainstorming days we have.

    We’ve been seeing my parents and in-laws outdoors, except for the coldest months in winter, all year. I miss my friends, though, and I hope we can at least go for drinks outdoors in the summer, even with partial vaccination immunity.

    I’m hoping for a warm summer so we can sit outdoors comfortably and share food again when we’re all fully vaxxed. My son’s almost 12, so I really hope he can get vaxxed this summer, too.

    I realize I’m very privileged because I haven’t suffered during the pandemic. I don’t know anyone who’s had symptomatic Covid, never mind been hospitalized for it or died from it. I don’t have any older family members in care homes that I haven’t been able to see for months. I’ve been able to WFH and I’ve probably been more productive at home than I would have been at the office, because there have been fewer interruptions. I absolutely love the fact that I don’t have to commute to the office. Except for two months last year, my son’s been at school, and even when he’s home he lets us work. He’s been sick less often than normal, in spite of going to school in person, because the covid precautions they’re taking also prevent other illnesses. Kudos to everyone who’s been and continues to WFH while supervising their kids in remote school, never mind younger kids who don’t understand why their parents can’t pay attention to them.

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  • Bittergaymark May 14, 2021, 10:49 am

    I have slowly been meeting up with other vaccinated friends. Most of which I had NOT seen in over a year. And it is bizarre to see them again —- in that it somehow simply doesn’t FEEL like it has been that long. We’ve often ZOOMED etc. So it is kinda mind blowing that there so many people I have NOT physically seen in the past year. Thank God for ZOOM, I guess. It really did keep friendships alive and active for me.

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  • Ele4phant May 14, 2021, 11:18 am

    I’m pregnant and have been fully vaccinated over a month now. It took some time to get there, but at this point I feel pretty comfortable with the idea that while risk cannot be totally eliminated – the risk of me getting sick or making anyone else sick is really low. Low enough that I can get back to “normal” interactions without feeling fear.

    My husband will be fully vaccinated tomorrow and we’re going to get brunch. Ideally we’ll sit outside (mostly preferred because it should be beautiful and sunny) but I feel totally okay with the idea of being inside if outside sitting is full.

    Honestly – I’m ready to have a few months of normality where I can see people and do things, because I’m having twins this fall so my life is going back into lockdown mode regardless of what happens with Covid, so selfishly yeah, I want a chance to have a bit of a pre-child post-Covid life.

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    • Dear Wendy May 14, 2021, 11:49 am


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    • MaterialsGirl May 14, 2021, 2:22 pm

      TWINS! wow congrats!

      and yes, especially with fall/winter babies you go in total lockdown/’stares of death’ for every cough or sneeze mode. I actually forgot how it is(my son is almost six months now and has been in daycare) and we were over visiting (fully vaxxed) friend who just had a baby. Kids were playing outside and when she came in, my daughter coughed. it was kinda throaty and i was like.. ‘uhhhhhh okay we’re gonna go byyyyeeeee”.

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      • ele4phant May 14, 2021, 2:35 pm

        Yeah, I’m sure we’ll be just as locked down as ever.

        I am so so so thankful though I got vaccinated. When it was first available to me it was like “Weeeellllll we don’t know how risky it is for pregnant women or their babies, but we know COVID is pretty bad for you so you can get it if you want.”

        It was a pretty nerve wracking decision, but since then it’s come out that not only is it safe and effective for pregnant women, there’s some strong evidence that antibodies get passed onto the babies – so we’ll be less worried about COVID once they’re out (although of course there are all those other seasonal illnesses to worry about…).

        If you’re breastfeeding, sounds like you may be able to pass on some as well.

      • MaterialsGirl May 14, 2021, 3:30 pm

        I am breastfeeding and that has been extra motivation to keep at it

    • ktfran May 14, 2021, 6:26 pm

      Congrats on the twins!

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  • Kate May 14, 2021, 6:36 pm

    OMG check out Fashion Pass. I will quit Haverdash in a second if this works out!

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