Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Am I being selfish?

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This topic contains 16 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by avatar CET 3 weeks, 4 days ago.

Viewing 5 posts - 13 through 17 (of 17 total)
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  • #843560 Reply
    Skyblossom
    Skyblossom
    Participant

    Did you know that there was a good chance that she would schedule a wedding in December and you decided to plan your trip and figured she’d have to schedule around it? If so you definitely need to attend the wedding. How long has it taken you to save for this trip? Can you modify the trip and return a day or two early?

    If you knew nothing about them getting married in December and so planned the trip and you will be out a large sum of money I’d go on the trip. Foreign trips are expensive and you could be out a lot of money. That is only if you had no idea that they might get married in December and if you can’t get a refund of most of your expenses. If possible come home a day or two early. If you knew that there was a probability that they would get married in December then take this as a lesson learned the hard way and go to the wedding.

    There will always be conflicts over wedding dates. The closer to the wedding the couple picks their date then the more conflicts they should expect. Not every conflict is easily remedied.

    Also, how badly do you want to attend the wedding? Are you looking for a reason to not go or do you really want to go? Are you and your sister close? Do you love each other, like each other or tolerate each other? Does she want you there? Could she be picking this date just so you can’t go? I’d consider all of this when deciding what to do.

    #843563 Reply
    avatar
    Oracle

    It is really poor form to ask someone to move a wedding date. His sister tried to move it and could not. Time for him to just be quiet.

    #843586 Reply
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    brise

    If your flight is booked, you have just the departure day to delay by one or two days. It shouldn’t cost you too much, hopefully. Have you tried?
    If it costs you the price of the first trip to your vacation destination, then deduct this price from your sister’s wedding gift. And go to the wedding.
    If the flight is not booked yet, then yes, definitely, change your dates.
    Vacations are movable. Not a sister’s wedding.

    #843591 Reply
    Skyblossom
    Skyblossom
    Participant

    Traveling overseas is usually thousands of dollars. If he is in a first job this could be a years savings. He shouldn’t have to lose that much to attend his sister’s wedding. I wouldn’t expect the sister to change the date of her wedding but I don’t expect him to give up thousands of dollars to attend it either. He should see how much it would cost to adjust his travel plans. If it was a few hundred dollars he could change the plans and consider that her gift but he better make sure she knows that is his gift. On top of that would he need to travel to attend her wedding? Does he have enough extra money to make a second trip if he does need to travel?

    #843960 Reply
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    CET

    Ugh. It’s a pain, but I would call and see about changing the airline flights, your bookings, etc. Just call and see what they say.

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