Am I the drama?
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It was my first day back at work after having a baby. I haven’t been apart from my little one more than a few hours and I was in work from 8 until 5. We have a boundaries issue with my inlaws turning up unannounced and they came over 5 minutes before I was due home – we always ask them to call. Since it was my first day back at work, I was so nervous, tired after a long day and all that kept me going was the thought that I would see them at the end of the day. When my in laws left, I told my partner that I was a bit upset and I wished they would have came over an hour later so we could have our time alone and enjoy dinner together as a family as it had been a difficult day. My partner thought I was being so selfish. Is it selfish of me that I expected that on my first day back? I am by no means saying to my inlaws not to visit after work but I wish that they would know that some days are not good for us and respect that
You are not being selfish, reinforce those boundaries. Youre partner should understand where you are coming from – he should be telling them to call first. His parents – his problem.
So looks like you’re answering your own question here, but at least doing so reasonably, haha.
I don’t think you are being selfish and yes, your partner should be the one enforcing that boundary. Sounds like your partner may not mind their parents dropping by unannounced, though.
You really should probably talk to your husband when you’ve cooled down because it sounds like you have an issue with him not respecting your wishes over your in laws. Did he really say you were so selfish? That’s rude and pretty cold.
That’s funny that you answered your own question, but hey, do what you gotta do. Your husband is unreasonable and sounds like a big baby who can’t enforce boundaries with his parents. You absolutely should have time to decompress at home after a long day – whether it’s your first day back at work after maternity leave, or three months after you’ve been back – and if he doesn’t understand that, there’s some empathy missing in him and you’ll have to tell him that it doesn’t matter if he understands or not – you need an hour at home after work before anyone else is welcome over unless it’s an emergency or special circumstances.
