Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Anyone find true love and a partner after 40?

Home Forums General Chat Anyone find true love and a partner after 40?

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    Like I said in the thread about love after 30: I believe anyone can find genuine love at any age, and my friend’s grandpa met a girlfriend in a nursing home in his 90s.

    As far as having kids goes, I think the odds change as you age, but it can still happen. Some dating advice I got a couple years ago when I was in my late 20s was to date older, and I started opening up my dating range to include men up to their early 40s when I was about 29. It’d previously seemed too old to me but I quickly found that it wasn’t. All this to say: It’s possible you can find a match in a woman who is still young enough that there’s still some time to have kids.

    Or you could date a woman who already has kids from a previous relationship.

    But if I’m being honest, it doesn’t sound like you’re terribly interested in fatherhood. You’re just now aware that the window is closing and it’s making you second guess yourself. You don’t have to have kids if you don’t want them!

    I’m a happy person, but also somewhat shy when I first meet new people. I’m also not quick to fall for people. But, online dating has worked for me twice now notwithstanding because I tried to keep expectations realistic in that I knew I probably wouldn’t be in love with anyone after a few hours together. I just needed to decide if they were worth one more date.

    Lastly, is there a reason you don’t fraternize with locals living abroad if the expat pool is so small? Is it not allowed or are you simply choosing not to? My family lived abroad when I was growing up, and I recall one of the international schools I went to had exactly two young, single expat teachers and they became fast friends and there was a lot of speculation that they were an item. Because yeah, it did seem like so much of the expat community — at least where we were — came in the form of couples or families. But we did also meet a few expats over the years who ended up putting roots down because they married a local.

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