Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

DW Community Catch-up Thread (Formerly ‘Anyone going on awesome dates?’)

Home Forums Advice & Chat DW Community Catch-up Thread (Formerly ‘Anyone going on awesome dates?’)


Viewing 12 posts - 6,577 through 6,588 (of 11,343 total)
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  • #743745 Reply
    Avatar photohfantods

    Ale, I’m wishing you all the best. I don’t have any advice to give but thank you for being honest and sharing and u think all this advice is helpful for anyone reading.

    Ahhh, Copa, that’s pretty funny! I see one perk of being neighbours is just being a short walk away from home. Reminds me (sort of) of the movie The Big Sick where the guy essentially forced the girl to say she had to take a dump (hence why she was leaving). So it’s not all smooth!

    #743749 Reply
    Avatar photoCopa

    Ha. Yeah. I kinda wondered if it was in poor form to leave, but I’m in a busier/stressful period at work right now and had to be up at 6 today, and when the clock hit 2:30, thought NOPE! If it had been a weekend, I would’ve dealt with it. It’s still super early, I know, but if we keep seeing each other, we’ll need a nighttime plan for the pups.

    Also, @Ale, I’ve been thinking a bit harder about what I did the last time I needed to snap out of a funk. It’s maybe weird and cheesy, but one thing that helped me was picking up running as a hobby. It was something I didn’t think I could do (like, at all) and it made me feel really accomplished and proud of myself every time I set and accomplished a new goal. And my goals, especially at first, were tiny. It doesn’t have to be running or anything active, but I think if you can find something that lets you set goals and track progress that also makes you have that feeling of “wow, look what I just did,” it may help. It helped me, generally speaking, in other areas of my life with keeping a positive mindset and silencing that little voice in my head that sometimes says, “You’re not good enough. You can’t do this.”

    #743961 Reply
    Avatar photoStonegypsy

    @Ale I’ve also found for myself that when I get into funks like that, doing something creative, or teaching myself something new, helps a lot. Practicing guitar and learning a song I really like, painting, cross stitching. Not only does it give me an extra reason to value the time I have to myself (I have so much time to practice/get this cross stitch done/figure out how to use oil paint with water to get that really neat effect I saw at the art museum last weekend), but it gives me something to show for it.
    Anytime I get into one of those phases where it feels like a Hurculean effort to get out of bed in the morning, and I feel down on myself for not being where I thought I would be, I start making sure that I’m doing something like that for at least 30-60 minutes of the day, every day, and it usually helps me.

    #743976 Reply

    Thank you all.
    I actually enrolled in beauty school a couple months ago. I’m on my way to become a licensed nail tech and later in the year I’ll start makeup lessons. I practice during the weekends on a plastic hand ?.
    I have my career, my job, my masters, but I’d always wanted to learn how to do nails properly, however, lazy me never did anything. So, one day being really sad I just went and enrolled. It’s expensive but it’s really relaxing to learn. It’s helped so far and maybe later I could profit from it

    #744187 Reply
    Avatar photoveritek33

    @Ale, as always, I’m sending you good thoughts. Good luck with the beauty school!

    As for me – two things.
    1. My parents are meeting the man this weekend. Pray for us lol.
    2. The guy I dated two years ago that bought me a star and turned out to be a lunatic? Texted me today to try to get me back. All sorts of apologies and such. It was entertaining, but I blocked him after a good laugh.

    #744190 Reply
    Avatar photoMoneypenny

    OMG, I remember the guy who bought you a star! He texted you after *2* years?! Nutjob!

    #744278 Reply
    Avatar photoTheLadyE

    Ok you guys. I have a huge crush on a coworker and there’s literally nothing I can do about it so I’m coming on here to talk about it.

    He’s awesome: brilliant, charismatic, funny, adorable…and did I mention brilliant? We get along so well and he’s always joking with me. Ironically he’s also about 5’3” and I’m 4’10” and I’m sure he rarely meets women shorter than he is. One of the other women at work said she would never date him because she’s like “a foot taller” than he is and I wanted to be like I’M NOT! Me me! Lol.

    However, he’s super active and into sports and camping and I am more…indoorsy…so I constantly have to tell myself to remember that – we’re not lifestyle compatible. Also I just started here and dating a coworker is poor form.

    Anyway now we’re working on a project together and I really have to try not to be all heart eyes and flirting around him because I think he is the bomb dot com.

    Just had to tell someone. Thanks for listening! ?

    #744283 Reply
    Avatar photoCopa

    Why not go for it, though? Or at least get to know him a bit better outside of work as friends to see if you have a deeper connection, rather than deciding you’re not compatible because he likes to camp and you like to stay home. (You can be active and a homebody. I know because I am an active homebody.) Meeting at work isn’t uncommon and unless I’m mistaken, most companies are okay with it so long as one person isn’t supervising the other.

    #744286 Reply

    My husband and I work at the same company. In fact, since college I’ve met nearly every man I’ve dated at work. I can only think of one where we met at a bar and the other I met through a coworker. It’s my thing I guess?

    Also of note, after each break up, we were able to remain friendly and there were no issues.

    It’s not for everyone though. I was careful about who I chose to date and already knew them prettt well.

    I like Copa’s idea of hanging out outside the office. Get to know each other in a non-work setting and see if you’re compatible. Invite him to HH sometime. Or your stand up show?

    #744289 Reply
    Avatar photoCopa

    Yeah! I think getting to know him as a work friend first is a great idea. Worst case scenario, you realize you’re truly not compatible but make a new friend.

    I’ve seen a couple romances that started in the workplace go south after the break-up. One was a divorce, and that one was sad but remained civil. I did have one friend who created had drama after a workplace break-up, but she created/sought out the drama (I think because it was a way of staying connected to her ex, but that’s neither here nor there) and I have no sympathy for that situation.

    Anyway, I understand the anxiety that comes with putting yourself out there in this kind of situation (see also: my second guessing my every move with Neighbor), but if you found someone amazing and compatible… if you proceed with caution and a level head, it’s worth the risk, right!?

    #744290 Reply

    I’m gonna step up here and say dating a co-worker was awful for me. I still have to see him every day, him being friendly with his lovely girl friends that I hate. But we’re civil. We talk sometimes. But moving on has been harder.
    My sister married her coworker, and it has been awesome for them, so there’s another thing.

    #744291 Reply
    Avatar photohfantods

    Is lifestyle compatibility really an issue? So he goes camping occasionally, that’s not too big a problem. But yeah, get to know him better! Exciting to have a crush.

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Reply To: DW Community Catch-up Thread (Formerly ‘Anyone going on awesome dates?’)
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