Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Asking for advice

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This topic contains 9 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by avatar mozajik 1 week, 5 days ago.

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  • #811076 Reply
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    mozajik
    Member

    Hello all iam 24 old boy , i meet girl wild back in elementary school ,she always left a strong impression on me.In 2012 we volunteered together at one festival there we got closer (we had a one deep conversation), in that conversation it took you in my head to know that it seemed like it all stopped and the world around me just turned around.Over the next few years I saw her and only had a basic conversation. But her smile was always in place exactly for me to intrigue me. I saw her a month ago she smiled in passing and wave at me. I decided to contact her on facebook. I wrote Hi, she answered Hi, I looked at the message, but I just could not write anything.

    #811078 Reply

    I would…

    1. Brace myself for the possibility that this could be a 1-sided crush, as nothing here really indicates a mutual attraction (A conversation and a smile doesn’t constitute attraction)

    2. Start with “How are you?” and “What are you up to lately?” and hope for the best.

    #811081 Reply
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    JD

    Ya hi is usually followed with “how are you?” It’s really not complicated.

    #811090 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    What they said.

    Also, this? “her smile was always in place exactly for me to intrigue me.”

    No, it wasn’t. She was smiling because she felt like it. It wasn’t “for you” to “intrigue you.”

    #811093 Reply
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    JD
    Member

    @kate the smile thing, and some other writing made me think English perhaps is not LW’s first language. Hoping he meant something more along the lines of “her beautiful smile intrigued me”.

    #811095 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    Yeah he’s not in the US, but guys say that kind of thing a lot. We don’t always smile for you.

    #811098 Reply
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    mozajik

    @kate i know it not smile for me.

    #811102 Reply
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    ron

    You seem paralyzed by fear of rejection. Don’t be so shy in politely approaching her. She may or may not like you, but for sure, if you keep hanging back she will pass you by, whether she originally liked you or not. Simple conversations are a good beginning. Don’t start by telling her what a super crush you have on her. If she seems interested in talking to you, take it from there. If she shows minimal polite attention, but no real interest, then you have your answer.

    #811105 Reply
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    Essie
    Participant

    I think your problem is that you’ve built her up in your head into The Most Perfect Woman in the World, the woman of your dreams. You’ve been carrying this fantasy picture of her in your mind for years…and you don’t really know each other.

    Just slow this thing way, way, down, and talk to her about everyday stuff. How she’s been, if she’s gone to any other festivals she’s enjoyed, anything you can think of that you might have in common. Get to know each other. Slowly.

    #811122 Reply
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    mozajik

    Thanks all for answers

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