Bisexual female. Sex life sucks. Missing women.
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So for context, I’m a bisexual female married to a straight man. We’ve been married for almost 6 years and our sex life is not the best. I’m into intense stuff like BDSM, role playing, weird fetishes and just using the bedroom as a platform for creativity. Whereas my husband is more into vanilla sex. Where he and I just lay there. He always lasts about 5 minutes in bed. A few minutes more if he uses a condom.
I’ve been telling him about my sexual needs for years, and there have been some changes. Like him being a little more aggressive and spanking me, and that’s about it. I just want more though…perhaps it’s because I know what it’s like to experience that high intensity in bed, and nothing we do has reached that level.
Lately I’ve been thinking about women. Sex with them never lasted 5 minutes. My last sexual encounter with a woman lasted til the crack of dawn. I miss oral sex being done on me. Husband is not into that. I just miss being in a sea of bliss at night, and I’m tired of using my vibrator alone to finish myself off.
My question is, is there any hope? Although I have been thinking of women, I don’t ever plan on having an affair. Apart of me wants to talk to him about an open marriage though, but I feel like that would hurt his feelings. Is there a way to communicate this desire without hurting his feelings? Or should I just continue to try to improve our sex life? And hopefully these feelings of dissatisfaction will go away? What would you do in this situation?
You should definitely talk to him about all this. I understand not wanting to hurt his feelings but you’re on a path toward falling out of love and not feeling connected to your husband anymore if you keep all this to yourself and you two don’t work together to address your satisfaction. That might mean exploring your sexuality through an open marriage. Discuss it with him! There are lots of ways to explore extramarital intimacy and maybe there’s a way that appeals to you both and that your husband would be willing to try. Any hurt feelings or awkwardness you might feel bringing it up with your husband would be worth the price if it saved your marriage. And if it doesn’t, it will still be worth it to get out of a situation that doesn’t and isn’t going to satisfy you.
I think you need to communicate with him, really. Be open and honest. This isn’t really something to ignore or pretend you’re not feeling.
I’ve read your post about your challenges with your sex life as a bisexual woman and missing connections with women. It’s important to prioritize open communication with your partner about your desires and needs. Speaking of connections, I came across a blog that delves into online dating and relationships, specifically focusing on Serbian dating. Exploring different dating dynamics might offer you valuable insights into forming connections that align with your preferences. You can find the blog here: https://victoriyaclub.com/about-online-dating/serbian-dating/. Remember, seeking understanding and discussing your feelings with your partner can lead to a stronger and more fulfilling relationship.
