- This topic has 61 replies, 1 voice, and was last updated 6 months, 3 weeks ago by Fyodor.
August 4, 2019 at 9:41 pm #849506KeybladeGuest
You failed to provide their birthdates, places, and birth times, along with a lock of hair from the brother and a personal item of his partner. I can offer a hex for marriage, but it will require a check or money order sent to my private P.O. Box.August 5, 2019 at 5:46 am #849516FyodorGuest
The drama has already begun. He is demanding an engagement party.* BoF’s parents will throw one but only in their city, which is close to where the bride and groom live. He wants one thrown in the city of the bride’s family (which is also where we live) and has volunteered our house for it, without asking us.
*I don’t know anyone who had an engagement party. On top of that, he’s 40 and this is her second marriage.August 5, 2019 at 6:21 am #849519LisforLeslieGuest
Oh my. Well I suppose you’re going to have to either take the direct way out or the genteel-dowager-correcting-the-abysmally-mannered-youths way out.
“We’re happy to have a get together, but an engagement party just wouldn’t be right as this would be Sister’s second marriage. So we can have a barbecue so everyone can meet you and toast to your happiness but we’ll make sure to communicate to everyone that it’s just to welcome you to the family (blech) but that no gifts are expected or allowed. I mean, it’s not like as two adults you need new china right?” *
Or “oooh, that’s not going to work for us – we’ve just started redoing the kitchen and guest bathroom.”
With that second one, anytime they call, just get SoF to bang a hammer on a block of wood from a different room.
* Part of me wants you to send the invites out with “no gifts please” and then when he gets all butt hurt, give him everyone’s emails so he can personally demand gifts. But he sounds like the person who would. Of course, you can also recommend to your family members that they chip in together to buy gifts; like a couple of the aunts and uncles buy a single place setting.August 5, 2019 at 7:12 am #849524BittergaymarkGuest
Just say NO to hosting a party. More… Pointedly ask him why he never hosted such a party for you? Tell him that his failure to do was taken as a rather deliberate slight that left you both so terribly hurt. His response will be priceless — I’m sure.August 5, 2019 at 7:14 am #849525FyodorGuest
Yeah, we’re not hosting a party. Thankfully our city row house isn’t big enough for what he wants,so we may be able to avoid the issue altogether.August 5, 2019 at 7:18 am #849527BittergaymarkGuest
Well, at least still ask him my question. I am being glib and snide here, sure. But the question is legit. 😜August 5, 2019 at 10:16 am #849572LisforLeslieGuest
I’d kinda like to see that question asked too – but I don’t think he was in the picture at the time.
Fyodor – I think you need to be prepared for the “well, host it at a local restaurant” suggestion. This guy has brass ones.August 5, 2019 at 10:49 am #849588ronGuest
It sounds like parents defend you wife’s sib because he is a tad off mentally. This is bizarrely entitled for a second marriage at age 40. It is really the BOF’s parents’ responsibility to get the two of you out of this, rather than leaning upon you to attend.August 5, 2019 at 11:13 am #849594FyodorGuest
Well, before taking this on directly I am hoping that BoF’s parents will prevail on having it in their city. If not,hopefully, our inadequately small city house will present an issue. If not, it’s just too bad that I will be washing my hair or airing out the linens that day.August 5, 2019 at 11:14 am #849595FyodorGuest
He’s not off mentally in the way that you would normally think. Just massively selfish and entitled.August 5, 2019 at 11:17 am #849596FyodorGuest
There is ALSO additional drama in that BOF, who must travel a ton for her government job, has asked them to try to nail down a date well in advance and will not commit to keeping her schedule open until they decide.August 5, 2019 at 2:08 pm #849634SkyblossomParticipant
Was he the special, favored child and mom made sure life always revolved around him and his wants?