Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Confused about my boyfriends behaviour in our relationship

Home Forums Get Advice, Give Advice Confused about my boyfriends behaviour in our relationship

This topic contains 28 replies, has 10 voices, and was last updated by avatar Hazel 4 weeks ago.

Viewing 12 posts - 13 through 24 (of 29 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #843735 Reply
    FireStar
    FireStar
    Participant

    I’m so sorry. What happened to you is unforgivable. Please call a rape hotline in your area and speak to someone. Block this man from your life every which way you can. He has made it clear that he does not give the slightest care in the world about you and he will absolutely do this again.

    #843754 Reply
    avatar
    cdobbs

    My thoughts were exactly the same as @bittergaymark and I’d like to add as soon as you said no he should have stopped….you should NOT be with this man!

    #843758 Reply
    avatar
    Helen

    After you break up with him & block him everywhere, tell your loved ones he violated you and they must not feed him information about you or your whereabouts. He doesn’t sound like the type to just let “his” woman go. What a monster

    #843768 Reply
    Dear Wendy
    Dear Wendy
    Keymaster

    Echoing everyone else’s concern about this guy. What he did to you was rape, and what he has done to you leading up to it — the crying, the picking of fights, the gaslighting – is a manipulative move that losers make to try to control their partners. He is an abuser and a misogynist and you will never, ever have a healthy and happy relationship with him. Please leave him, and reach out to the very sources already suggested to get the support you may need to process your feelings. I’m sorry this happened to you.

    #843777 Reply
    avatar
    FYI

    Just want to reiterate that this was rape. It wasn’t just rude or disrespectful or whatever; it was a felony.

    Not calling anyone out, just thought it was important to use the right word for a crime, so that LW and others understand how important this is.

    #843778 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    Rape it may be. But if she were to try to pursue that angle — eh… it will get her nowhere fast. Dump the guy and move on. No prosecutor will ever pursue this case.

    #843779 Reply
    avatar
    FYI

    It’s so that SHE knows what just happened to her and can stop thinking about being a rapist’s girlfriend.

    #843785 Reply
    Guy Friday
    Guy Friday
    Participant

    BGM, I’m not sure about that. I might believe that a prosecutor would be luke warm about the shower, or the initial sexual encounter after the shower, but the third one, with the physical force to overcome resistance and the comment you referenced, is probably the point where a prosecutor would change their mind and charge multiple counts of sexual assault with the idea of forcing a plea to at least the last encounter. In most places, that’s going to be enough for lifetime registration on a sex offender registry, and I’m not necessarily going to cry a whole lot of tears for the guy if he gets that.

    #843789 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    It’s a he said / she said case. I have heard so many tales of much stronger cases being rejected…

    #843809 Reply
    avatar
    Logan

    WTF did I just read a rape story and the LW doesn’t even know she got raped?? this man is psycho and him flexing ” I’m a man I can do whatever/whenever” is very troubling. Next time he will choke you out while doing it or you will wake up in the middle of the night with him inside of you, and he will be like I felt like I wanted to do it so I did it…

    #843852 Reply
    avatar
    PDX816

    There is not a lot to add that everyone else hasn’t covered but I wanted to let you know how very sorry I am and please know that you aren’t alone. I have also been raped and it is HARD not to go back and rethink all the things you could have done or said and the hard truth there is absolutely nothing you could have done to prevent this. He violated you and you are in no way at fault. Please seek out counseling, talk to people, and get this piece of shit out of your life for good.

    #843884 Reply
    avatar
    RedBlue

    When I see the term on again off again means that there are issues that will never be resolved. Move on.

Viewing 12 posts - 13 through 24 (of 29 total)
Reply To: Confused about my boyfriends behaviour in our relationship
Your information: