Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Dear Prudence

Home Forums General Chat Dear Prudence

This topic contains 10 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by avatar LisforLeslie 3 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #738020 Reply
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    Fyodor

    This first question is great. Why won’t anyone help her with her reasonable request?

    https://slate.com/human-interest/2018/02/dear-prudence-my-daughter-in-law-let-me-in-the-delivery-room.html

    #738026 Reply
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    TheHizzy

    Aye, Mom. I can see how she’s hurt from her view but it’s not her place to demand to be in the room. This grandma will be the one who drops by at a moments (or no) notice to visit. I sure hope granny can get over the “snub” and feel lucky she gets to be there at all.

    #738030 Reply
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    ktfran
    Participant

    I read that this morning! She totally needs to apologize to her son and DIL and repair the damage.

    I totally understand that she feels left out, but this is 100% not a good reason/time to throw a fit about it. And the whining about the other grandma getting to see/hold the baby first? Who cares? This baby will not know the difference. Ever.

    #738048 Reply
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    Fyodor

    ” I called Julia’s parents and asked them to please reason with their daughter, but they brusquely and rather rudely got off the phone. ”

    The best advice questions are not from people complaining about crazy things but crazy people asking questions from a place of craziness.

    #738050 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    I can’t imagine ever being bent out of shape at NOT being invited into the delivery room. Hell, I’d be more upset to be invited. Not all of life is theatre and thus requires an audience. That LW is batshit crazy.

    #738057 Reply
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    JD

    Uh sorry id prefer you not stare at my vagina. What a nutter butter.

    #738058 Reply
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    Mar1985
    Participant

    I always think this is so odd – and people forget to look at it from the aspect of the woman in labor. Having a baby is scary! The daughter in law just wants the comfort of having her mother around for her own reasons. It is not because she wants to give her some “first look” at the grandchild. I remember telling my in laws I wanted my mom there before my c-section because I was scared but asked that they not come until after the baby had been delivered. Thankfully they are not insane and were very understanding! I’ve made my Mom go with me to other medical procedures too hah, so it isn’t exclusive to just childbirth.

    #738083 Reply
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    Fyodor

    I wanted to record my daughter’s birth but my wife selfishly refused.

    #738099 Reply
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    Rangerchic
    Participant

    My husbands brother’s wife (at the time, they are now divorced) asked asked to be in the delivery room when my second child was born. I thought it was the strangest request ever and no, I didn’t want her there at all.

    However, I was present at my nephews birth 12 years ago. My (younger) sister was young (18 or so) and I remember our mom was there to. It was getting close and I said I’d leave now and she asked me to stay. So I stayed – and helped support her. The father nearly passed out so I’m glad I was there. I remember seeing him be born but I don’t have any recollection of private areas (some commentary was like that would be so gross, etc but it’s not the focus.at all.). It was an amazing experience!

    #738307 Reply
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    JD

    Yes I have been in numerous births, you are NOT focusing on the private parts so that is not gross. Also, when giving birth you could care less who is looking. The pain is so intense it really is the least of your concerns. You are far more interested in it being over and not dying.

    I was in the delivery room for a family members two kids as well as one friends C section and another ones natural birth. Always amazing to be a part of but not something I am begging to do (hello 72 hour labors you have to stay away through) nor upset when not asked. I have been there when asked for the other person not my benefit.

    #738375 Reply
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    LisforLeslie

    If I were the daughter in law I’d be ok but only if I got to attend and participate in and partially direct her next Gyno visit “skooch down”, colonoscopy “just relax” and mammogram “you’re going to feel some pressure”.

    The way this woman talks you’d think she sees her daughter in law as nothing more than an incubator.

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