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Dear Wendy

Did we make the right choice moving to Canada?

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  • #875938 Reply

    My husband and I moved back to Canada last year. We lived in Japan for 3 years. My husband is Japanese but spent a year in Canada before, that’s when we met. It was a lot for us to move here and get settled. We didn’t realize how expensive it is to live in Canada (I am Canadian but prices of living have changed since I lived abroad). With both of us working full-time we won’t be able to afford a house for another few years. I also just found out I’m pregnant. I wanted to move back to Canada because I thought our life would be better but my husband does not seem happy here. Did we make the right choice? I miss Japan too but I will miss my friends and family in Canada. I also miss my friends and family in Japan. My heart is so torn and I don’t know what to do anymore.

    #875978 Reply

    Isn’t Japan just as expensive as Canada? No matter where you choose you’re going to miss something or someone. Stay where you are for 2 years. Give yourself time to settle in. Facetime everyone you miss in Japan. Vacation there. Enjoy your universal healthcare you ingrate! Can you tell I’m American lol

    #875980 Reply

    The real estate bubble from ten years ago never really popped in Canada’s major cities. Depending on where they live it can indeed be ridiculously expensive.

    #875984 Reply

    There is a two year rule when you move. Stay, settle in. You would not want to move again so soon with such a young baby. It will get better. After two years see how you feel.

    #876048 Reply

    Also consider the baby, is Canada better vs Japan for the child growing up? If the child is a girl it seems like Canada would offer more opportunities. Also, if your child is biracial they will be consider to be “Gaijin” which literally means outsider. Gaijin are never fully accepted as Japanese.

    #876220 Reply

    Afraid I don’t have any real advice to offer, but I do want to empathize with your situation. My husband and I are also from two very different countries/cultures, and it’s not easy. We’ve always lived in his home country but have considered moving to mine. It sucks that one of us will inherently be a world away from our family. That said, I like the idea of giving it 2 years in Canada. That way you’ll know you really tried, and if you end up moving back to Japan, you can do so with confidence and not just as a default.

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