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Dog Adoption: Moral Dilemma

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This topic contains 72 replies, has 10 voices, and was last updated by avatar iliketea 3 months ago.

Viewing 12 posts - 25 through 36 (of 73 total)
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  • #847086 Reply
    CurlyQue
    CurlyQue
    Participant

    Would it be possible to tell the shelter that they can give YOUR number to the two women if they would like to plead their case and that you’re willing to listen to it. That way you feel that you gave the owners another opportunity and then if you don’t hear from them you can also feel like you’ve done all you can.

    if you don’t want to give out your number you can create a google voice # or something so that it rings to you.

    #847096 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    Agree, Skyblossom. Like people are saying oh, we’re making assumptions here, but the *facts* you know are that the women didn’t pick up their dog in time from a kill shelter, no kids are involved, and the owners seemed unemotional to the shelter staff. And you have connected with the dog emotionally and the fact is you can provide a loving and stable home, and you don’t have any evidence to support that the former owners can do so.

    #847099 Reply
    Copa
    Copa
    Participant

    I’d give the dog back. Too much judgment on the owners here without enough information, IMO. Dogs know and love their people. This dog probably misses his family and if he could talk, he’s probably tell you he wants to go home to them. Absent signs of abuse or neglect, I think it’s selfish to keep him.

    #847114 Reply
    avatar
    Vathena

    I think CurlyQue’s suggestion is a great one- ask the shelter to give them your contact info. If they truly don’t care about the dog, they’ll never call, you can ride off into the sunset with your pup and a clean conscience!

    #847122 Reply
    avatar
    PDX816

    I actually don’t think that asking the shelter to give your phone number is a good idea, there is a surprising amount of contact information that can be found with phone numbers and if you decide not to return the dog then they could easily start to harass you or dig deeper for more information. At best I would offer an email address that isn’t your name.

    That being said, if I knew my animal was in a kill shelter with a deadline and I was struggling to come up with the money I would be contacting the shelter daily with updates, small payments, whatever it took for my animal to be not be adopted or euthanized. There is no easy answer, you hurt in one scenario and the old owners hurt in the other scenario. The shelter manager’s reaction would be where my decision weighs, I have volunteered with a shelter for almost 10 years and it shows when an animal is beloved. If the manager tells you that you are the preferred choice I would trust them.

    #847716 Reply
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    LadyClegane

    I strongly urge you to keep the dog. I agree there can be extenuating circumstances, but quite frankly having a pet is a privilege though the law doesn’t always treat it as such. Hopefully the former owners will learn from this or maybe they won’t, but either way the only thing you can be in control of is making sure the dog has a good home by giving him one. It would be one thing if you found a lost dog or something, but I really think you did the right thing by adopting the way you did and it was for the owner to do what they needed to. Sometimes our mistakes cost US, not someone else who did the right things.

    #847717 Reply
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    Ele4phant

    I disagree with most here, I think you should give the dog back.

    Less than a week seems awfully short to me to give away a dog, especially if the owner has been found and indicate they want it back. Yeah yeah yeah, they called them and told them the deadline, but, it was just a couple days. I feel like the shelter should’ve done their very best to reunite this dog with its family and give a couple of weeks and multiple explicit warnings before even showing the dog to potential adoptees.

    And, some of the talk about being unable to pay the fee and that being an indication they are unable to care for the dog adequately strikes me as a wee bit classist. Was the dog in good health, mentally and physically? If yes, then it would seem they were capable of providing a good home for this animal, even if it took them a week to scrounge up an unexpected $130.

    Honestly, if it were me, I’d give this dog back. I know you are becoming attached the more you get to know him, but think how attached they are. They’ve had the dog much longer than you. The shelter staff says they seemed unemotional and that it didn’t seem urgent to them to get the dog back, but the staff aren’t mind readers. At the end of the day, they showed up and asked for their dog back. Their actions indicate that they do in fact care about being reunited with their dog.

    I really think the shelter did a deservice to everyone by putting it up for adoption so soon. It’s not fair to you or them. I get shelters are busting at the seams, but if the shelter identified and got in touch with the owner, and they say they are coming to get the dog, you should give them a longer grace period to get it together, and you shouldn’t expose the dog to members of the public that could become attached.

    #847729 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    There are rules and regulations for good reasons, and I think the shelter staff knows what they’re doing based on experience.

    Unrelated, I know a guy who, after our company was sold, missed the deadline to fill out the paperwork with the bank. By two days. He didn’t get his $250,000 payout. He thought the rules didn’t apply to him. Meanwhile, literally everyone else filled out their form on time, even if they were only getting a little bit of money.

    Be an adult, follow the rules, know there are consequences. If it was only the money, I’m sure they could have worked something out with the shelter.

    (That same guy a couple years later got busted for trafficking a 17-y/o prostitute across state lines. Conspiracy, actually, because he was in it with her bf/pimp and some other guy. He decided to plea against them and go down on a cocaine charge instead. I’m not saying everyone who thinks the rules apply to them has THIS bad judgment but there’s probably some pattern).

    And finally, WHO do you know who doesn’t get emotional about their dog? Especially when up against the possibility of losing him? Seriously, I don’t think that’s normal.

    • This reply was modified 3 months ago by avatar Kate.
    • This reply was modified 3 months ago by avatar Kate.
    #847739 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    “Was the dog in good health, mentally and physically? If yes, then it would seem they were capable of providing a good home for this animal.”

    Maybe, maybe not. If he’s a young dog, he just may not have any health issues yet.

    Classist or no, look, if you can’t afford maintenance and upkeep on your car, you can’t afford a car. Same with a house, if you can’t afford repairs and upkeep, you can’t afford a house. Same with a pet. But again, it’s not even as much about the money as, *they missed the deadline, knowingly.* If you have to have weeks and multiple explicit warnings to come get your dog, how concerned are you really about the dog? I’m not sure if you’re a dog owner, but this just doesn’t work for me.

    #847742 Reply
    avatar
    Allornone

    I hate to say it, because part of me wants to give the former owners the benefit of the doubt, but I kind of agree with Kate.

    I just got a kitten, Catsby. I’ve had him maybe a month, if that long. If he got out/lost and I knew a shelter had him, I’d be driving down the second I found out. After only a month, I can’t tell you how much he means to me and how big a part of my life he is. And I say that as a dog person. There is absolutely no way I could wait six fricking days to get the little guy back if I knew where he was. I cannot even fathom.

    #847744 Reply
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    CET

    This is hard but my opinion is that dog is yours. My vet bill each time for just regular things is more than $130. Large vet bills are $300 or more. I don’t know…if someone has a hard time coming up with $130 then how do they afford to even keep a dog? Flea and tick medication, heartworm pills, teen cleaning and shots all cost money. The shelter told them they had to come by a certain day and they didn’t. That’s odd. I would be FRANTIC to get my dog if the shelter had her…I would be waiting at the door before they opened and if I didn’t have $130 in cash I would use a credit card.

    #847753 Reply
    Dear Wendy
    Dear Wendy
    Keymaster

    Keep the dog! Are you keeping the dog? I hope so! I’m not a dog owner but I’m a cat owner and have had cats since I was a very broke, unemployed 21-year-old. There have been times when my cats needed expensive medical care and I barely had any money and I still made it work. I put that shit on credit cards, borrowed money, used what little savings I had. When you are a loving pet owner, you make some sacrifices. If this dog owners couldn’t come up with $130 in a week’s time to save their dog from a kill-shelter and weren’t there in person — or at least on the phone if they happened to be out of town —pleading for an extension, they really don’t care enough. Keep the dog.

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