Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Finding love in these times

Home Forums General Chat Finding love in these times

  • This topic has 6 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 1 week, 4 days ago by avatarLisforLeslie.
Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
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  • #998598 Reply
    avatarA tee
    Participant

    Hello! My first post on here. Anyway been talking to someone since last summer and tried to do a couple of virtual dates, but no success. My plan is to ask her to a wedding this summer. By then it should probably be safe Hehe. I try not to be needy and text her only like once a week. Watcha guys think? No give up responses though. Thanks

    #998635 Reply
    avatarCleopatra_30
    Participant

    Why would you want to invite a person to a wedding, let alone date someone when they can’t commit to a virtual date, or make you feel like you need to limit your contact with them?

    Sorry, this one is a dud. MOA and find someone who is just as interested in you who is willing to put the time and effort (which at this point for a virtual date is pretty minimal), and doesn’t make you paranoid with messaging.

    #998639 Reply
    avatarron
    Guest

    Yes, she’s just not very interested in you, at least romantically, may not even be available. For certain, she won’t go to a wedding with you. That’s a preposterous thought. You’ve talked to her on-line. You can’t make a first meet in-person something long and involved like a wedding/reception. Summer also might be a tad early to expect a return to pre-Covid normalcy.

    #998761 Reply
    avatarA tee
    Guest

    Oh! Well someone told me to ask her closer to the wedding! Here’s to being preposterous

    #999340 Reply
    avatarCopa
    Participant

    You shouldn’t be taking someone to a wedding as a first date, especially when you’ve never even met! And especially when she doesn’t seem interested and can’t even commit to a virtual date. This entire situation is odd.

    #1001526 Reply
    avatargolfer.gal
    Guest

    She shut down a video chat, which is a low effort way to at least see if there is attraction. Does she ever text you first? Has she ever broached the subject of dating you? When you text her does she text back and keep the conversation going?

    You don’t want to be told to give up. I’m not sure why you wrote in if you don’t want honest advice, but, ok. Go ahead and ask her now. The chances she’ll say yes are very, very small. And when she says no (or maybe or I don’t know which are all soft ways to say no) I hope you’ll move on and start investing your time into other people and opportunities. If this is a pattern – investing in people who aren’t investing back in you, continuing to want a relationship after the other person has given signals they don’t, not wanting to hear/face uncomfortable truths- it would be worth talking to a counselor about these issues. Therapy can help immensely and you’ll come out a much happier person. And self confident, happy people attract other great people to them.

    #1001596 Reply
    avatarLisforLeslie
    Guest

    You are playing games – limiting how often you reach out to her not because you’re busy or have other things going on, but because you don’t want to seem needy.

    Are you not meeting up because of COVID or are you not meeting up because she’s miles and miles and miles away?

    Also, a wedding as a first date sounds just awful.

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