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Dear Wendy

High school help

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This topic contains 3 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by Lucidity Lucidity 2 months, 3 weeks ago.

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  • #833308 Reply

    I’m in my third year of high school and I feel worthless. I go to a pretty competitive school and college is a must in my family. From school and family, I’m expected to go to a pretty good college, but I feel like I’m setting myself up for failure. I don’t really have a talent or anything or something that’s “my thing.” I never joined a sport in high school because I’m socially anxious and way too insecure to put myself out there like that. I do really enjoy exercise and sports but I feel way too insecure (even by myself) about being inexperienced or a sad wannabe (+ it’s way too late to join a sport to look good for colleges). I play the piano but I’ve never participated in any competitions. I am a part of technology clubs (i want to major in engineering) but it’s nothing serious or substantial enough to compare to what other kids do. For example, it only affects me the day of a meeting, which is usually once a week, but other than that day, there aren’t any other responsibilities. My grades are okay but from my school A’s are a given. I also feel terrible because I’m currently only taking 3 AP’s this year and have only taken 1 AP test since the start of high school. I volunteer weekly by teaching kids through STEM activities and I have a job teaching small kids reading and writing but I don’t see how that will contribute to getting into college. This year has been stressing me out because I’ve never been this unmotivated to study or work. This obviously has not helped my grades and just seeing how great other students are doing just makes me feel even more unmotivated. My SAT scores aren’t the best either and I promised to study hard but, again, I’ve just been so unmotivated. With all this stuff, I’ve been feeling pretty terrible so I’ve been distracting myself with YouTube, social media, and online comics. Everytime I do this just to feel a little happy makes me feel even worse when I end up having to work because it’s so late and I got nothing done. I really don’t know what to do and I’d like to hear your guy’s thoughts

    #833329 Reply

    You don’t need to have a special skill or talent. You don’t need to know what you want to do. That’s for college. Classes there with spark an interest. Mainly you need to not compare yourself to other people. No matter how good anyone is at anything someone is always better. That’s ok. You do need to focus on your grades and getting into college. It is important for your future. Or if not a trade school. Regardless you do need further education than high school or you will struggle in life.

    Make a schedule. Write it down. Plan time to study. Two hour chunks or whatever. Then cross it off when you’ve finished. Speak to your school counselor. They exist exactly for this.

    #833332 Reply
    Lilly Pad

    Quit comparing yourself to your peers, someone is always going to look better than you when you are comparing. Most people don’t have a special skill or talent they have something they like and push it off as their specialty. For the procrastination get a cheap egg/cooking timer, you can use the one on your phone but I find the cheap one is better for timing your social media breaks. I work from home and have one that I use to play Candy Crush or else I will have to work late. Talk to a your counselor to see what you need to get into your desired school and your backup schools and ask what at this point you can do to make yourself more marketable if anything.

    #833333 Reply

    I don’t think you’re giving yourself enough credit! Colleges don’t just care about sports. They will care about technology club and your piano-playing and your volunteer work and your part-time job. These show you’re a well-rounded person with several different interests, that you’re responsible enough that you’re trusted to work with small children and that you can juggle multiple responsibilities and manage your time. Additionally, teaching is a important skill. Not everyone has the patience and the maturity and the communication skills necessary to be an effective teacher. Colleges will absolutely care about this. Highlight your teaching experiences when it’s application time.

    Your grades are a different issue. You need to address your motivation and procrastination problems. The biggest, most helpful thing you can do is discipline yourself when it comes to time wasters like YouTube and social media. You can’t do those things before you start your work anymore. You have to save them as treats for after you accomplish something. An egg timer is a good idea. You could allow yourself 10 minutes of online comics for every hour of studying (and stop when the timer goes off!), or you could set a goal such as “If I finish this assignment tonight, l can spend as much time on YouTube as I want before bed.” It’s called delayed gratification and it’s a really important life skill to learn, but it’s not easy. It’s really, really easy to waste time online, but you’ll find these things are much more enjoyable if you can save them for after you’ve accomplished something. They’ll feel like a reward, rather than things that make you feel guilty. You’ll be happier and less stressed. If you have the patience to teach small kids, you can do this. Good luck!

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