Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

his friend "interviewed" me (probably on coke) on our third date and

Home Forums Get Advice, Give Advice his friend "interviewed" me (probably on coke) on our third date and

This topic contains 160 replies, has 13 voices, and was last updated by avatar ellie j 2 months, 1 week ago.

Viewing 12 posts - 73 through 84 (of 161 total)
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  • #837084 Reply
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    FYI

    BUT, for the future, why don’t you try being honest when people ask you to be honest?
    This text from you — “i dont get offended that easily he was just curious i think.” — wasn’t true at all from what you posted here. You WERE offended. You’ve said so over and over.

    #837085 Reply
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    ellie j

    @FYI

    true, i was more offended by him though, the friend thing was just overwhelming to me, and he was on coke. but the way he handled the situation was what really got me.

    #837086 Reply
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    ellie j

    yeah i think i was tryin to answer individual replies keep repeating myself over and over haha, sorry

    #837087 Reply
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    FYI

    Well, in the future, you will have to practice being upfront, instead of texting “LOL” when you’re ticked.

    #837096 Reply
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    Kate

    That text thread was ridiculous. I don’t even know where to start. On your part it screamed “I’m fine, bye,” and on his part it was like, “I know you’re mad but I don’t really care to try to figure out why, have a great life.”

    Seriously. I think you’re really off with your perceptions if you believe you didn’t show you were offended or upset.

    Finally, I think he probably texted his friend to come to the bar, don’t you? You were having this marathon date, and maybe he was ready for it to be over.

    #837099 Reply
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    dogmom

    I’m with Lucidity, FYI and PurpleStar — this is WAY too much mental energy on a guy you went on three dates with. His text is clearly a goodbye with all the “I wish you the best/I understand if you don’t want to hang again.” Don’t bother texting him one more time — just chalk it up to a lesson learned and move on. And next time if something bothers you, say so instead of being all “LOL why would I be offended somebody on coke was interrogating me and then my date blew me off to play pool?”

    #837210 Reply
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    The_B

    1. This guy you’re dating is immature
    2. His friend is immature
    3. You should not want to hang around people, nor do you especially want to date people, who do hard drugs.
    4. As a woman in the STEM field who sounds like she has an exciting and expansive future ahead of her, please trust me when I say you can do better once you realize you don’t have to hang out with people who “do coke sometimes but try to stay away from it”
    5. As another poster alluded to, it was rude that he didn’t have the basic manners to wait for your Uber with you, especially since he is only a few dates in. I imagine its because he wanted to hang out with his loser friend when you were finally shuttered away. Imagine what that attitude is going to be like mere months down the road, when he supposedly doesn’t have to make a “good” impression due to the early date honeymoon.

    #837213 Reply
    Bon Vivant
    Bon Vivant
    Participant

    6. “trying to stay away from it” is 100% BS. The amount and frequency he reports to you is BS.
    7. The BS about amount and frequency will continue.
    8. He stayed with his buddy because the buddy was holding.

    Don’t ask me how I know this.

    #837214 Reply
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    Kate

    9. He ASKED the buddy there to bail him out and give him a bump.

    #837224 Reply
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    ellie j

    I agree with every points mentioned, tbh.

    not sure about the last point @kate because our original plan was me going to see my friend at the end of the day, and he said okay i will see my friend as well.
    But at the end of the day, i was like oh i should probably text my friend and meet up with her and he was he prefers me staying with him as much as i could if i have to go. I dont think he was planning on running into that crackehad.
    But to be honest, i ran into this crack head on our first date actually. We were walking and passing by the bar, and he said hi to him and we did our own things.
    i think that crackehad just lives in that bar, lol…..

    #837225 Reply
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    Kate

    Oh, that makes sense then. Why didn’t you just go meet your friend before his friend showed up? If you had plans with her, you should have kept them. It’s not a good look to be so hung on a guy by date 3 that you’re blowing off your friends. Or really ever, unless he’s sick or something bad just happened to him.

    #837226 Reply
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    ellie j

    I never had solid plans with her, so i told him beginning of our date that i might have to go see my friend later tonight

    When i told him i was gonna text my friend at night what is was up to, he was like “oh if you dont have to see her he prefers me being with him, saying “i want to hang out with YOU” He said his friend (not the crackhead) hit him up but if i dont have to go he will tell him that he cant see his friend

    and we ran into that cokehead who lives on that bar street, lol….

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