Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

How Long Before You Say I Love You?

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    #1096705 Reply

    The only person who said he loved me took a year and four months to bring up this topic, and appeared in the same statement, trying to tell me that what he thought would not happen is out of print. (In other words, I love you…) He had felt this way before, but he didn’t dare to mention it. Maybe I will say…in nine months, if I were so brave!
    In my opinion (just my opinion!) I find that every five or six months is too fast, which makes me a little scared. I think it takes a long time for me to really recognize someone and let my emotions expand slowly. I think I am such a person. I have a feeling that for a task, it is easy at the beginning, *I think* you already know someone and you can’t, but…I don’t know, this is also because I burned a lot (! !) So I am very careful.

    #1096772 Reply

    Confession time: My husband has said “I love you” to me exactly once, when I held our newborn son in my arms. To this day, I’m not completely sure if he meant me or our son, either. I don’t remember if I’ve ever said those words to him, the closest I’ve come is probably “you’re very dear to me” and “you’re the most important person in my life.”

    He shows his love in many different ways every day, and I certainly feel loved in our relationship. I try to do the same to him.

    We’re both fairly pragmatic and rather unromantic people. For example, when I was about 6 months pregnant, I told him that I’d really like to be married before our baby’s born, and he was like “Okay, I’ll call city hall about a license tomorrow” and he did. We printed out the application forms, sent them in, and got married at city hall when I was 8 months gone.

    This just to say that it’s entirely possible to have a strong relationship without much romance, if both partners feel the same way about it.

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