How To Approach A Boy I’ve Had A Crush On For Months

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  • February 8, 2023 at 7:00 pm #1118650

    I’ve had a crush on a boy since around the beginning of the school year. We’re both within a year of the same age, I’m not sure how old he is but we’re in the same year. He has chorus, I have chorus,(different groups though), he has drama, I have drama, he’s the president of the DnD club, I’m in the DnD club, it just seems like we have similar interests which I think is a green flag. He also made a reference to a V.C. Andrews book in a drama club meeting once, and I’m super into psychological horror which made him even cuter. I find myself randomly thinking about him sometimes, I remember every interaction we have and every time I see him without having to try too, and he’s the first crush I’ve had that’s made me nervous at all. (like palms sweating, face all red, you get the memo) I’ve only really talked to him a couple of times, but I can’t help staring at him whenever he’s around, I have to force my eyes away. Even if he isn’t interested, I still think he’s really cool and I’d be satisfied just being friends too.
    I’ve been kind of trying to send subtle hints like lots of eye contact and mirroring his actions a (as in if he crosses his legs, I’ll cross my legs), and trying to talk to him a bit, but I just don’t know if I should just keep quiet about it or try to actually talk to him, and I don’t know how to approach someone who makes me this nervous. How do I talk to this boy without making a fool out of myself? Do I just wait for an opportunity or keep pining? Do I flirt or just talk? I have no idea what to do since most crushes I have are people I already know personally! Help!

    • This topic was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by harpy.
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    Lily
    February 9, 2023 at 9:17 am #1118667

    Just go for it! Deep breaths, doesn’t matter if you make a fool of yourself, if you say something or do something ridiculous just laugh about it even if you’re embarrassed, it seems charming that way and you can probably recover from it while talking & can be embarrassed later when you get home. You got this. Not sure if you’re in high school or college based on what you said, so I’m not sure if you want to properly date him or just hang out with him more, but maybe invite him to do something one on one? If high school, study together? Go to an arcade? You’ll know what people your age do for dates nowadays. If college, ask him if he wants to go out for dinner, or ask him if we wants to come over to watch some psychological horror films & play DnD (that can probably work if high school too?). Anyways, bottom line, deep breaths, go for it, if you embarrass yourself chin up, laugh, doesn’t matter, you can recover from it, and you totally got this. You got it! Go for it!

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    Anonymousse
    February 10, 2023 at 1:54 pm #1118674

    Flowers in the Attic? I hope name dropping a teenage book about about an incestuous family and a horrible rape doesn’t make you quiver. Im hoping it was a different book! Are you a teen?

    Yes, you flirt and talk to them and stop trying to make subtle hints like mirroring their body language. Treat him like a human. Like anyone else except maybe extra smiley? and make a gesture depending how bold you personally are. Give him you number. There’s your answer right there, for better or worse. I personally always liked ripping the band aids right off real fast and finding out sooner than playing all these subtle hinting and waiting hopeful games, which 8 know are fun but they can hurt if you let them get too fantastical.
    I did have a football idiot I had a huge (solely based on looks) crush in in high school. I bet he would have, but know I am like, thank go I kept that a crush.

    No man is a mind reader esp. teen boys. But if he’s attractive, of a certain age with ladies throwing themselves at him, be wary. Best of luck! You can do this!

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    Anonymousse
    February 10, 2023 at 2:03 pm #1118675

    Ugh, sorry for the garble. *But now I’m like, thank god I kept that a crush^^

    Reply
    LisforLeslie
    February 11, 2023 at 11:23 am #1118679

    Typically teenage boys don’t understand subtlety.

    I know that putting yourself out there is scary, but my recommendation is to simply compliment him. You’re watching his every move as it is, so I expect you’ll notice if he handles a situation well or does something impressive. So if he handles a spat at DnD – afterwards, or within a day or so – say “Hey, you handled that really well. I think the group appreciates how you manage the club.” or something more teen-speak but you get my point. Drama club – “I think you could totally be Sky Masterson (or whatever leading role).”

    If he wants to continue the convo – he’ll make time. Everyone loves talking about themselves. If he’s not interested, he’ll agree with you that he’s awesome and he’ll figure out how to bow out politely (“Thanks, gotta run.”)
    Or he’ll be a dick and then you’ll know that he’s a dick.

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How To Approach A Boy I’ve Had A Crush On For Months

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