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I can’t pick between 2 guys. Send Help!!!

Home Forums General Chat I can’t pick between 2 guys. Send Help!!!

This topic contains 12 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by avatar LisforLeslie 2 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #834321 Reply
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    Claire Dunning

    I’m in a dilemma and I don’t know what to do. So there are two boys. One of them I’ve had a crush on for a while now he’s literally so smart, funny, nice, cute, hot and when chat we have really long deep conversations and he actually understands me. Thing is, he probably doesn’t like me, he might even like my best friend and I’ve been flirting and hinting things for a while now but it hasn’t really gone anywhere. Then boy 2 I only met this weekend he’s a hot older guy and he’s friends with my friends boyfriends so it works and this guy actually likes me except I don’t really know if it will work out from the conversations we’ve had so far. If someone could pleaseee help me I don’t know who I should go after as I like them both but I won’t go for 2 guys at once. Should I go for the guy that I actually really like but probably doesn’t like me back or should I go for the guy that likes me and I might like back but don’t really know just yet??

    #834331 Reply
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    JD
    Member

    You’ve known the one guy for like 5 mins. Slow down. If the guy you have a crush on hasn’t expressed interest move on. You don’t get to pick between a guy who doesn’t want you.

    • This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by avatar JD.
    #834338 Reply
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    Claire Dunning

    I’m not planning on marrying either of them. Guy number one has expressed interest just very little and idk how to read him and guy number two I just don’t know if I should express interest in him if I still like the other guyyyy

    #834340 Reply
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    JD
    Member

    Ya well since you clearly in HS I wasn’t assuming you were trying to get married. Don’t ask someone’s opinion on what you should do if you just want to argue why you don’t want to do it. You asked, I gave my input. Wait around forever for guy #1 if that makes you happy. Whatever.

    #834341 Reply
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    Claire Dunning

    It just didn’t sound like you understand the situation maybe I explain it badly

    #834342 Reply
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    JD
    Member

    WHat’s confusing? You like two guys, one you just met. My advice was clear. Doesn’t require more explaining.

    #834343 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    I don’t think it has to be an “either or.” Why don’t you just keep talking to both of them, since you seem to enjoy it.

    How much older is the guy you just met a day or two ago? I hope you’re not 16 and he’s 23.

    #834346 Reply
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    Claire Dunning

    It’s not that big an age gap he’s 18 I’m 16 and I only feel guilty talking to both of them I’m just so confused on what to do

    #834348 Reply
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    JD
    Member

    You aren’t dating either of them so what’s to feel guilty about?

    #834349 Reply
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    Kate
    Keymaster

    There is zero reason to feel any guilt about talking to two or more guys at once! Until you agree to be someone’s exclusive girlfriend, you can do whatever with whomever, just don’t tell the others about it. It’s fine. You don’t have to make any decision here at all.

    If you feel you MUST choose, then put the first guy on ice for a little while and talk to the second one. Do not make some announcement that that’s what you’re doing though.

    #834353 Reply

    It sounds like the first guy doesn’t like you that way. The second guy, you admit you don’t really like him yet. Or really know him.

    So neither. Go for neither. That doesn’t mean you have to stop talking to either of them, but also don’t freak out and make this into a big conflict when it’s not. You’re just talking.

    Take time and figure out what you want to do.

    #834361 Reply
    Lucidity
    Lucidity

    I would go for the guy you actually really like. You say you’ve only ever flirted and hinted at your feelings, so he may not have picked up on your crush. Even if he knows about it and doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, it would be nice to know that for sure so you can work on getting over him. It’s hard to fully focus on someone you like or might like when you’ve got unresolved feelings for someone else.

    Tell him, without beating around the bush, that you like him, and ask him out on a date. If he says no, it would be smart to pull back from the friendship a bit. If you’re having long, deep conversations, it will be hard to detach emotionally and move on.

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