Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

I have a crush on my childhood best friend

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  • #963467 Reply
    avatarEvie
    Guest

    I’ve known the guy for about 15 years (we’re both 25 now), and we currently live in different cities (I’m still in my hometown, but he’s moved across the country). We’ve always kept in contact, and met up with each other when it was possible.

    Both of us dated other people, and we are always good friends with each other, never crossing the line, and just so it happens, we’re both currently single right now.

    Recently, we’ve been texting constantly (much more frequently than before) and even staying up at night to chat with each other, and I’m developing a crush on him. He’s always been a nice, caring guy, and since I’ve known him forever, it’s so easy to be with him. And he’s been telling me that he’s been thinking about moving back to our hometown lately due to his family, but he hasn’t decided on anything yet.

    My previous relationship ended badly, so I haven’t dated for a while, and I think I’m ready to date again, but kind of want to proceed with caution. I’m just uncertain how to proceed from here. I don’t know how he feels about me, and he showed no sign of being attracted to me. And he isn’t certain he’ll move back, so I don’t know if I should wait for him? Should I wait and see or just stop myself from falling headlong into this? Or is there a way to subtly ask about how he feels about me, because I absolutely don’t want to ruin our friendship, or make things awkward.

    #963475 Reply
    avataranonymousse
    Participant

    You’re texting constantly and staying up late to talk to each other. To me that would suggest you have a mutual attraction.

    I don’t know, maybe you could joke that you feel like you have a crush on him and see what happens. I am a big fan of being fairly direct. That’s the way you find out. Maybe it will make it awkward, but if you like him and he doesn’t, you probably need to take a little space from the friendship anyways, right?

    #963477 Reply
    avatarEvie
    Guest

    Thanks for the advice, and that’s a good point.
    I guess another thing I’m stuck on is that if he isn’t going to move back, I don’t really want to start anything, because LDR sucks…

    #963479 Reply
    avataranonymousse
    Participant

    Yeah, you could just keep being friends and not say anything unless he does move back. In that case, I’d try to keep your feelings in check. Don’t get ahead of yourself.

    #963481 Reply
    avatarFyodor
    Guest

    Tell him you like him and that you hope he moves back so that you can smooch him.

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