- July 30, 2020 at 9:46 am #913253ConfusedGuest
Inside my head, this is a really big deal, so a bit of understanding would be amazing.
I’ve been crushing on my friend’s younger brother.
I recently went to this overnight class and met a guy. The guy I just met and I had sex and definitely have a connection, but I just feel like he loves me more than I love him. And I kind of love my friend’s brother and him.
How do I choose? Or should I just cut ties with both?
I need advice.July 30, 2020 at 1:02 pm #913624
Why do you need to choose? What’s the action item? Is either of them asking you to be exclusive with them?July 30, 2020 at 1:10 pm #913642
It’s also a little alarming to see you write that you love someone or someone loves you who you either just met or are only crushing on. There’s no “love” in these contexts, just liking or fantasizing or lust.July 30, 2020 at 1:17 pm #913656anonymousseParticipant
Do you really love your friend’s brother? Or do you like him? Do you really know your classmate is in love with you, or just that he likes you?
You’re not in a relationships with either of them. There’s no choice that needs to be made, immediately.
(I tend to think it’s a bad idea to get involved with siblings of close friends.)July 30, 2020 at 1:50 pm #913715AkeathParticipant
I would only pursue your friend’s brother if you are okay with losing that friendship and you don’t have a friend group that you would lose as well if you had awkward or angry relationship with that friend.
August 2, 2020 at 2:20 am #920510ConfusedGuest
- This reply was modified 1 week, 2 days ago by Akeath.
Yes the one I just met wants to be exclusive and has already started being protective and trying to get me to say he’s my boyfriend.August 2, 2020 at 2:23 am #920511ConfusedGuest
And definitely I appreciate all the helpful advice everyone is giving, it’s helping me out a lot right now.August 2, 2020 at 5:05 am #920829
I think you should tell him you’re not ready to be exclusive and you want to get to know each other better. Or you could tell him you like him but the chemistry isn’t there, and just stop seeing him.August 2, 2020 at 6:01 am #920941HelenGuest
Stop seeing the possessive guy. Possessiveness isn’t cute or flattering, its controlling and a giant red flag. Be cautious with any guy who demands a quick commitment. That doesn’t mean he really likes you, its a manner of control.August 2, 2020 at 7:30 am #921114
Yeah really, your best bet is to just stop seeing him entirely, as possessive behavior and pressuring you into exclusivity (and saying he loves you??) this soon are bad signs. But you might have to learn that the hard way. Definitely don’t agree to exclusivity though.August 2, 2020 at 9:16 am #921326anonymousseParticipant
Definitely do not keep seeing that guy. And don’t be surprised if he turns mean when you turn him down. I’m not saying that you deserve that, only that it happens. No one is entitled to your time, attention or exclusivity just because you had sex once.