Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

In Laws. Never felt welcome and now they want to go on holiday! HELP

Home Forums Get Advice, Give Advice In Laws. Never felt welcome and now they want to go on holiday! HELP

This topic contains 37 replies, has 10 voices, and was last updated by avatar Leon 2 months, 1 week ago.

Viewing 12 posts - 13 through 24 (of 38 total)
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  • #850860 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    So it’s NOT personal. They literally do this to everyone. Let it roll off your back already.

    Be cheerful and friendly. That’s all anybody can expect of you… Again — your description of REALLY HOSTILE makes me question whether you truly grasp the meaning of the word.

    #850861 Reply
    avatar
    yorky1234
    Member

    I said that I “occasionally” let me partner go alone, so its not often its about 10% of the time.

    They actually invited my other half on a trip, but obviously I come with him. They said do you want to come on holiday, and later in the conversation said “she can come too is she wants”.

    I am making nice. But is does go both ways

    #850862 Reply
    avatar
    Brise

    As you will marry into this family, yes, you should go on this vacation. Perhaps they organise it because you will get married. They seem not to communicate well but at least they are not intrusive, right?
    For this trip, try to get your own car, as you will be three drivers. This will give you and your fiance some more freedom. Then take this as an experience, with some good humor. If it seems to you too long, don’t go the whole period and feel free, while you are with them, not to do everything always together. Take some time off. But yes, you should make the effort and join.

    #850863 Reply
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    yorky1234
    Member

    Bittergaymark – Yes I must agree with you, I suppose it may not be personal, but after 10 years I thought they’d back down a bit!

    Hostile means disliking/ unfriendly. Ignoring someone and being rude on a regular basis…I would consider that unfriendly…

    #850864 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    What exactly did you want them to do? ORDER you to come?! Issue a summons! Sure sounds like a perfectly normal invitation to me…

    #850866 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    Eh… Hostile is usually much more aggressive.

    #850867 Reply
    avatar
    yorky1234
    Member

    Hostile….google it.

    #850869 Reply
    avatar
    Kate
    Keymaster

    But they’re just like that, you said. It’s not personal. Don’t TAKE it personally. Don’t make it personal.

    #850870 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    And yet…. nobody here fucking agrees with you.
    .
    At any rate, yeah. You sound like a bit of a fucking headache.

    #850871 Reply
    avatar
    yorky1234
    Member

    That was completely uncalled for…

    #850872 Reply
    bittergaymark
    Bittergaymark

    No. That WAS hostile. See the difference. 😜😆😽

    #850873 Reply
    CurlyQue
    CurlyQue
    Participant

    My family didn’t accept my sister-in-law until she was actually married to my brother. Right or wrong, we viewed her as the girlfriend not family. You’re not family till you’re married in. Maybe your guy’s family is similar to mine.

    There was also more to it as we weren’t overly fond of her, and when they got married we gave up hoping they’d break up and decided to accept her.

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