Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Is he garbage or was I not good enough?

Home Forums Get Advice, Give Advice Is he garbage or was I not good enough?

Viewing 9 posts - 13 through 21 (of 21 total)
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  • #1098149 Reply

    That’s a good point, Ron. And it’s probably true — the sense of entitlement. The LW doesn’t even regard her own selfishness (cheating with a married person).

    #1098159 Reply

    He is a garbage person.

    You need therapy to figure out what’s wrong with you that you’re OK being part of his rotten orbit and allowing yourself to be used.

    Please get help. Seek better for yourself.

    #1098405 Reply

    sigh….didn’t even have to read the post before knowing this guy is garbage.

    And for future reference, if a guy tells you he is a crappy person…believe him. Don’t wait for evidence. Also, don’t date married men. It almost never ends well.

    #1098440 Reply

    Is this where we write the second act to “But I can Change Him?”

    Damn BGM – we really should write that. Any musicians out there?

    #1098889 Reply

    Honey, this man is crusty, dusty and all kinds of musty. Dont even bother asking honestly because hes clearly in his own little world up there. And its probably most definetely a little world down there too . . .

    #1099073 Reply

    Sorry, late to this one (just getting back on these boards), but holy crap.

    Protip: If a guy tells you he’s a sociopath, believe him. The only person that would make that up would be, well, a sociopath.

    Oh, and don’t date married sociopaths.

    #1099077 Reply

    For: LisforLeslie

    But I can change him.
    Re-arrange him
    Cuz my love is so
    Especially special

    You’ll say it’s not so
    That he’s a hot ho’
    Forgetting my love is so
    Especially special

    I say it is worth the stress
    He won’t always be a hot mess

    So I can fix him
    Rather than nix him
    Cuz our love is——
    (Yes! Our love is!)
    Our! Love! Isssssssssssss!
    Especially especially especially specially specially ‘xta SPECIAL!

    #1099080 Reply



    #1099094 Reply

    LW, you say, “It’s the instability that has me flabbergasted.”

    It’s not instability at all if you look at it from his perspective.

    He has already told you he is selfish and possibly sociopathic. He doesn’t care about other people’s feelings, only his own wants and needs. So he will say whatever he needs to say in the moment to get whatever he wants in that moment. He doesn’t care if it’s actually true. He doesn’t care if he said something different yesterday. In fact, it benefits him to be inconsistent because it keeps you stringing along. He gets to have you working hard to “win” him away from his wife, but you’d better not actually have needs or make demands because he just might go back to her (or the ex, or whoever).

    His behavior is perfectly logical because it gets him exactly what he wants — multiple women falling all over themselves to try to be “good enough” for him while he has no actual obligations to anyone (I mean, he’s trying to get out of paying child support for his own kid, for heaven’s sake!) Sounds like a sweet deal for him and a rotten deal for anyone who chooses to be in his life.

    Choose NOT to be in his life. This man will never, ever be honest, trustworthy, loyal or compassionate to you. He will only bring you pain. Free yourself from the drama and treat yourself to a therapist who will help you figure out what being loved really looks like (trust me, I wish I’d done it a long time ago with MY high-drama love life).

Viewing 9 posts - 13 through 21 (of 21 total)
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