- October 9, 2019 at 5:29 am #854021
Well it sounds like you’re having a fantastic time at your personal pity party. Enjoy.
I’m not going to give you unwarranted sympathy because you feel bad about yourself. There are plenty of people who are downright ugly and they have found companionship. The trick is lowering your expectations on what your partner looks like and being open to finding someone with a good personality and good heart.October 9, 2019 at 7:29 am #854032
To find someone with a good personality, you have to *have* a personality, and this LW is showing zero personality whatsoever. LW, if your typical communications look ANYTHING like what you’re displaying here – cryptic, weird one-line statements with a rigid, judgy religious overtone, and no attempt to have a real conversation – then yeah, no wonder you aren’t making friends or getting dates. I don’t know what to tell you.October 9, 2019 at 8:34 am #854037
Let’s begin with women you think look good. Who might some of them be? What is it that you think makes them look good?
For many women, the first thing to do is to get a good haircut. It can change your looks drastically. Which women’s hairstyles do you like?
Then get clothes that you like that are also flattering on you. I’m not talking about low cleavage or bare shoulders or skin tight. I live near a large Amish community. Their women wear clothes that are designed for women. Each woman wears clothes that fit her. They don’t have bare shoulders or low cut tops on their dresses. Their dresses never have a short skirt but yet they fit nicely and they look like women.
We also have some fundamentalist Christians in the area who believe there shouldn’t be a hint of a woman’s body showing through her clothes. They wear shapeless sack like clothing. Often no waist band and made out of heavy denim so that there are no hints of a woman’s curves to be seen. There is a huge difference between the two groups.
You can have modest clothing that looks good on you that you like to wear and that makes you look like a woman. If you want to be godly go and find those clothes. Take your time shopping. If you want to date make sure you aren’t wearing oversized, shapeless clothing.
Then, if you want to, experiment with makeup. Begin with something like a touch of blush on the cheekbone.
You can do all of this within your own comfort zone without changing who God made you to be. I don’t believe that God has ever said you can’t have a nice haircut or that God said you can’t wear clothes that fit or that God said you can’t wear makeup.October 9, 2019 at 10:27 am #854054
I want to add that there is nothing wrong with tight clothing, short skirts/shorts or cleavage but I’m assuming you don’t want to go there.
What do the women that you respect wear? Can you imitate them?
Another option for hair is a braid. Many of the conservative women have long hair and they will braid it and they look nice. You can find lots of tutorials about how to braid hair on YouTube.October 9, 2019 at 10:33 am #854055
I’m not doing this to only make friends I’m doing this to make more then friends.
What is the “this” that you claim to be doing? Cause to me it sounds like you’re not doing anything to make friends OR get dates.October 9, 2019 at 10:50 am #854058
Don’t worry, sweetheart. There is market for everything and everyone. I’m sure that with the right mindset, you would find someone.October 9, 2019 at 10:59 pm #854117
I better find someone.October 12, 2019 at 12:52 am #854348
Stop posting this. You got your advice, if you want different advice go elsewhere, but do not keep posting this question.October 12, 2019 at 6:32 am #854360
If you can’t find peace with your looks, you probably won’t meet someone who wants to be in a relationship with you. Stability and inner peace and powerfully attractive attributes.
There are things you can do to make yourself more attractive without surgery (the right hairstyle, clothes, confidence, social demeanor… etc.), but none of that matters if you don’t love yourself.
What are some positive attributes about your personality that make other people want to be around you? Are you kind, funny, sarcastic, intelligent, full of integrity?