Jealously of family member

[Tyryl]

Hi,
I’d appreciate your advice.
When I was 16, my cousin was born. It was apparent on his first year he was smart and strong. Since then I have developed jealousy of him, till now, 17 years later.
I really want to stop that jealousy.
I want to be grateful for my life and not compatr myself to him.
Please your advice is appreciated.
Thank you.

[ron]

As a 17-year old you compared your strength and intelligence unfavorably to a one-year old? Really! One cannot possibly project strength and intelligence at age one and less. My advice: make an appointment with a therapist.

[Bittergaymark]

Yes. This jealousy here is frankly very, very odd. And unusual. Therapy will help you unpack this.

[SuzFox]

Sometimes a certain person becomes the focus or symbol of our insecurity, however irrationally. I don’t think that’s unusual nor does it make you “broken” or bad. It’s just unhelpful, because the issue is your relationship with yourself, not outside you. I do agree with the recommendation for therapy, again not because you are lacking but because it’s a great way to work on issues of self-worth. Many therapists have sliding scales and do remote/Zoom sessions too. There are also a number of good books and workbooks. Be patient with yourself—-longstanding patterns take time to change—and keep the focus on yourself.

[Copa]

This… is… weird. Yes, you need therapy to get to the root of what I assume are extreme self esteem issues. I’m pretty much your age and the idea of being jealous of a 17-year-old is laughable.

[Author]

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