Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

None of my friends showed up tonight, and then they basically laughed in my face

Home Forums Get Advice, Give Advice None of my friends showed up tonight, and then they basically laughed in my face

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 17 total)
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  • #865485 Reply
    avatarHunter
    Member

    I invited like 8 of my friends over to hang out at the pool & cabana tonight. Spent close to $75 bucks on pizza, chips, ice cream, cookies, etc.

    I talked to them TODAY, and they said they were gonna come up. Spent an hour and a half waiting for someone to show up, no one came, without so much as a text or call.

    Then I called one of my friends to see what was up, and he pretends I have the wrong number (I’m no fool, I can recognize his voice), and tells me he’s Jake from state farm, and hangs up… dick.

    I’m feeling a little bit pissed off right now. What good does it do to be like that? It’s like I can’t even trust the people I’ve been friends with for years.

    #865500 Reply
    avatarHunter
    Member

    Okay turns out I actually DID have the wrong number, and he has a new one (old phone broke). Apparently he’s grounded for whatever, just texted me. Now this post feels kinda pointless.

    • This reply was modified 1 month, 1 week ago by avatarHunter.
    #865524 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    Don’t you always get to keep your number these days when you get a new phone or switch providers? I’ve had the same number for 18 years. He probably texted you from someone else’s phone after you called him.

    Here are some reasons that all 8 people would blow off your invite:

    1) Bad/unclear communication. If you’re having a party, you want to make it really clear the what, when, where, and what time, so no one gets confused. A group text is good for this. You also want to do a reminder on the day of the event. If you just kind of say hey, come by my condo tonight, I’m having a few people over to swim, and you don’t follow up, then they could forget or figure it’s really informal/optional/doesn’t matter if they show up. You need to get buy-in ahead of time. Maybe you didn’t.

    2) The people you invited aren’t really your friends, or they used to be back in 2nd grade but you don’t hang out anymore outside of school.

    3) There’s something about your home that people don’t like coming to, or there’s something more fun going on that night.

    Which one do you think it is?

    #865528 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    I thought of a 4th reason… the thing you’re inviting them to isn’t appealing. It sounds like you invited 8 HS senior guys to a pool party with ice cream. Now, I’m old, but like, that’s the kind of party my friend Karen had in 8th grade for her birthday. All girls. In HS, people wanted to go to a co-ed party at someone’s house whose parents were away. Or some crazy drive around that would end up in skinny-dipping with boys. Or you’d go out with a few girlfriends but the point was to meet boys. Boys who are seniors in HS maybe don’t want to go to a pool party/pizza party with other boys.

    #865533 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    Or if none of that resonates, maybe you’re just the scary kid who threatens to shoot other kids’ dogs.

    #865544 Reply
    avatarFyodor
    Guest

    Excited for this newest entry in the Hunter Cinematc Universe.

    #865545 Reply
    avatarFyodor
    Guest

    I think that kids can be kind of flaky and you shouldn’t order a bunch of food until you know they’re coming. What if they ate already? What if they don’t like pizza. Are these people that you normally hang out?

    #865546 Reply
    avatarFyodor
    Guest

    “Hang out with” or “with whom you hang out” before everyone yells at me for ending a sentence in a preposition.

    #865551 Reply
    avatarktfran
    Participant

    If you invited eight friends, why’d you only contact one to see what’s up? Were the rest really your friends? From my best guess using context from all other posts, these are people you want to be friends with and are trying to impress.

    At this point, I think your best course is to finish high school and start somewhere fresh. Stop trying so hard and stop acting a like a punk. Stop thinking you’re smarter than adults and listen to them.

    ETA: so basically Kate’s second reason is the most likely scenario.

    • This reply was modified 1 month, 1 week ago by avatarktfran.
    #865557 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    I’ve heard so many stories now from Hunter, and the only people he’s mentioned hanging out with outside of school are little cousins or nieces/nephews. So either he invited 8 little kids to a Friday-night party and no one could make it, or he invited 8 classmates who aren’t friends. Or none of this even happened.

    #865587 Reply
    avatarHunter
    Member

    I invited 6 HS senior guys and 2 HS senior girls over to a pool party so we could swim, play poker, and drink. The plan was was for everyone to BYOB.

    I hang out with these people in school and at other places too. Two times I went to a beach night with some of my friends this summer, and all they pretty much did was sit around a campfire, drinking beer and passing a bong around.

    Also, I called him on the house phone (my cell’s been broken for a while), and texted him using Instagram.

    #865591 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    I don’t know, it’s hard to tell. Tbh, I doubt a lot of what you tell us, so that makes it harder to give you advice.

    BYOB is an issue when you’re having a party. If it’s a drinking crowd, they’d expect booze to be provided by the host. Plus, how realistic is it that kids could drink at your condo pool? You need privacy if you’re underage. Kids want to party somewhere they won’t be observed.

    Then there’s also just potential poor communication around the invite and the fact that you act like a punk.

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