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Dear Wendy

Nowadays cheating?

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  • #858157 Reply

    Do you consider online cheating as real cheating? Let’s say your partner is talking to someone via video call and they’re showing each other’s private parts and etc.

    #858167 Reply

    Definitely cheating. Even though it’s not physical it’s disrespectful to do that when you have a partner. A loving partner should get all they need from their other half, if they feel the need to get attention elsewhere then there’s a serious problem.

    #858194 Reply


    #858209 Reply

    If it’s done behind your partner’s back its probably cheating

    #858233 Reply

    How it’s done says a lot. If it is by stealth then they/you know they shouldn’t do it.

    If the partners have discussed it and both agreed to it then it is okay.

    If one partner decides it’s okay without discussing it then you have a huge communication problem and you probably won’t come to a happy conclusion. At that point you may as well break up. So, if one partner is openly doing this but the other partner is very unhappy about it then you aren’t compatible because what you value and want are two incompatible things.

    #858250 Reply

    It’s cheating.

    But it doesn’t matter what anyone else says. The real question is this — do you want to be with a partner who sends dic pics to someone else? Is that okay with you? Even if the Supreme Court said, “Technically not cheating,” you can still decide it’s not something you want in your life. You could say, “Okay, the Supreme Court has spoken, but I just flat-out don’t want to be with a partner who does that, so I’m breaking up. Byyyye!”

    Don’t get manipulated into arguing over definitions of words. Just decide what you want and don’t want.

    #858262 Reply

    Yes, video calling and taking crotch shots or dick pics or whatever is cheating. Your husband is a lying jerk who’s trying to manipulate you into forgiving and forgetting, but has he actually even genuinely apologized? He wants to convince you that what he did wasn’t wrong, but imagine if you had done the same. I doubt he’d be so generous and forgive you. I don’t see much hope that you will be able to trust him again because he’s untrustworthy and instead of being sorry and repenting, he’s desperately trying to turn the facts around.

    #858263 Reply

    I just saw that this was the same person person as Emelia on the other post. Why post under two names?

    Yes. In the situation you described in the other post this is definitely cheating.

    #858276 Reply

    Eh, I don’t call this cheating.

    That said — maybe if more straight people were even just a wee bit more exciting in bed — this would happen less often… Doubtful. But who knows… Monogamy is a hilarious artificial construct that clearly ONLY fucks people up.

    Hell, just read dreary letter after drearier letter on here. Monotony remains as bad as imaginary friends from the great above. A lot of silly nonsense, guilt, and needless drama. But hey — go ahead! Make yourself fucking miserable, everyone!

    Sigh… Yeah. I simply don’t get it.

    #858284 Reply

    Well,the good news BGM,is you don’t have” to. You do you, we do we,all is okay. Obviously,I would define the L.W.’s problem as cheating.

    #858291 Reply

    Classifying some cheating as “real cheating” and others as not “real” makes no sense. Are there different levels to cheating? ok, sure. Does it matter? No

    If your partner would view it as cheating then it’s cheating. What counts as cheating in your relationship should’ve already been discussed. If you want a relationship with more “openness” then end this one and enter a more open relationship with someone else.

    #858293 Reply

    If your S/O meets a girl and starts messaging with her all the time, it’s already weird and not okay. He starts talking about a threesome? That is a huge red flag and time to run. Unless you’re into that, which most of us are not.

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