Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Should I be feeling guilty?

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  • #1101455 Reply

    So a few years ago, a work colleague (lets call him B) and his gf broke up as he cheated on her. I sort of fancied this colleague at the time and it had been a few weeks that he had broken up.

    Well, after the Christmas party, I invited B into my room but I told him nothing would be happening which it didn’t. We slept in the same bed and he fondled my breasts a bit and tried to touch me down there but I wasn’t feeling it and then he also tried to force my hand onto his dick which again I didn’t want to do so I pulled my hand away. It didn’t develop into anything after that. I was upset, I liked him and was showing him that I liked him but he kept avoiding me. I then realised that he had gotten back together with his gf and I felt so bad.

    Fast forward to the next year and I started liking another guy (lets call him J) at work but his brother is best friends with B.
    Things developed really fast between J and me to the point where right now we are engaged and living together.

    However J’s brother is really close with B and hangs out with him a lot – J’s brother’s wife and B’s gf are best friends. I saw a post of all four of them together recently.

    Should I feel guilty about the night in the room (3 years ago) even though nothing happened? I’m worried that J’s brother may have told his wife and family and I don’t want them to see me negatively. It also means that perhaps I can only have a limited relationship with J’s brother’s wife and not be besties with her as she is with B’s gf.

    I also recently heard some contradictory stories where B was still with his gf at the time and they were spending time apart. However, at the time B told me they had broken up.

    Side note: J knows the whole story and was cool with it all. Also I stopped liking B before I met J.


    #1101456 Reply

    You’re worried over nothing. Why would B tell his family that a chick almost touched his dick? I seriously doubt he told his wife. Why would any of this prevent you from being close to her? You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s like you’re slut shaming yourself.

    #1101457 Reply

    Whoa, no, there is nothing here to even give a second thought to. This is absolutely nothing.

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