Talking to a married man, am I wrong?
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I’m gonna talk to him about it. I don’t want to just end thus abruptly but I know it needs to end.
Don’t talk to him about it. Why? The way to handle this is to take his cues and step way back with the messaging until it naturally fizzles out for good. Which it very likely will because you two have no history or foundation and he’s already seemed to withdraw and lose interest.
But really, you have a lot to learn about trusting strangers on the internet, tolerating and excusing poor behavior, and how to cut people off who behave inappropriately. I hope you start to be able to pick up on signals and respond accordingly before you get hurt.
Chiming in late… you don’t have to ghost him but you also don’t have to “Talk” to him. Relationships only work if two people participate. So tell him that you’re done and he won’t be hearing from you again. You don’t have to explain yourself. You don’t have to give him reasons. You’re being kind by saying something but I think the oft repeated line here is that you owe him nothing. He’s not a friend. He’s a bit of online vapor that has been getting close to you for months and is likely now at the point where he’s going to start nudging that line to see if you’re in for sexting and noods. If he put half of the energy into his marriage that he put into talking with you – maybe his marriage would be better. Maybe not – but it does seem like his priorities are skewed.
I know I didn’t have to say anything to him, but I wanted to. All I did was just ask him if this is inappropriate and that if it is then I don’t want to continue to talk to him. Thats the general gist of it. Trust me, I’ve probably learned my lesson now.
just to clarify, I only continued to talk to him in any regard because he said his relationship was open. If he never said that there would be no way in hell I would do that. I understand now that I only have his word, and he could have completely lied about that. It’s not that I didn’t think it was a possibility, it was just because our conversations were (or appeared to be) honest, truthful, and genuine so I didn’t think he was lying. From now on open or closed marriage, I’m gonna stay far away.
Why ask HIM if he thinks it’s inappropriate? Whether it is or not (it is) doesn’t hang on what he says or thinks. How about what YOU think, as an adult with a moral compass and the ability to think freely?
Also, if you were only willing to talk to him if his marriage was open, then your conversations were not simply friendly. You knew it was questionable. If it was all on the friendly, platonic, up-and-up, why would he even need to assure you he’s in an open marriage?
This is a guy who’s in a bad, falling-apart marriage seeking random strangers to chat with online. It’s not a situation you want to be part of.
Wait, didn’t you just argue for pages that this wasn’t sexual, there was no flirting, it was just for companionship? What does it matter if his marriage is actually open or not? (Not that I believe it is, and even if it was- your wife comes first, not a stranger on the internet.)
The more you try to explain why you can’t stop texting him, the worse this all sounds. He doesn’t care about you. It’s disturbing that you don’t seem to comprehend or understand that you don’t know him, or his relationship.
I stopped following this thread because this woman is exhausting. I just looked that it now has taken 7 pages and she still id being exhausting. Don’t you worry honey, any man would run anyway, you need not end it. How can it take you 7 freaking pages to learn to not talk to a married man! Good lORD!!
If you’re exhausted by my thread please feel free to ignore. I learned my lesson and that’s all that I care about. Yes our conversation was only friendly and that wasn’t inappropriate but him taking about his marriage was. He’s a married man, and he shouldn’t be talking to me about his issues. Dude I comprehend I don’t know him, I’m not an idiot. I never said I know him inside and out. Our conversations were fine, they got personal, but they were fine. I’m over explaining this over and over again. I appreciate the responses and I respect everyone’s opinion.
