Dear Wendy
Dear Wendy

Your kids are a bad influence on mine

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  • This topic has 29 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 1 month ago by avatarbrise.
Viewing 12 posts - 13 through 24 (of 30 total)
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  • #1008550 Reply
    avatarFYI
    Guest

    Aunt Shea said they were 8-9 years old.

    That is WAAAYYYYY too young to be swearing. Seriously. Tighten the reins.

    #1008551 Reply
    avataranonymousse
    Participant

    Yeah, you’re right. I hope.

    #1008579 Reply
    avatarBittergaymark
    Guest

    I suspect that the boys simply go crazy with the play the games online. My own nephew has picked up some colorful terms there. And little kids do tend to often bring out their very worst in one another.

    I think you need to NOT be too defensive, but instead accept the fact that maybe you should monitor their screen time a bit better. Also… YES to more board games! They can be so much fun.

    #1008589 Reply
    avatarMaltaKano
    Guest

    Some of you are being super judgy and it just makes you look ignorant. It is WAY harder to control kids’ exposure to curse words these days. I started playing Among Us after a friend’s 7-year-old put it on my phone and taught me to play. All the kids play it. And of course it’s public, so it’s rife with cursing, just like a lot of the videos they can click on accidentally and the tv shows parents are watching on the background. The commenters who are focusing on teaching kids context are right. Those of you who think somehow her 8-year-old boys WON’T be experimenting with curse words at a sleepover have clearly never met an 8-year-old boy.

    #1008598 Reply
    avatarbloodymediocrity
    Participant

    I’m with @MaltaKano here. Trying to hide swear-words from kids is a losing battle. Of all the things to stress about as a parent I’m hard-pressed to worry about swear words. Teach your kids context, but good grief. I was very much a goody-two-shoes kid and I definitely swore up and down around age 8. Swearing among friends is different from swearing by grandparents or teachers.

    I honestly think the sister is at least a little over-the-line here. By 8 she should have assumed that her kids would have learned swear words and had that conversation preemptively. And it’s unfair to assume that the swears were words were taught by the cousin. There’s no way that’s the only place he’s ever heard them.

    #1008615 Reply
    avataranonymousse
    Participant

    I don’t think I’m being judgy or particularly ignorant MaltaKano, for saying most parents of 8 year olds appreciate parents sticking to some social norms regarding swearing. You really think 8 year olds should be let loose into the world of adult language? That’s an interesting stance to have.

    I actually do have young kids. I never said I would be able to or have or would try to shield my children from swear words for the rest of their lives. We’re talking about an 8 year old.

    This is the reason her sister doesn’t want her kids over there.

    #1008622 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    I’m not a mom, so flame away, but little kids know swear words. They learn them from older kids or wherever. Or even from adults. There’s nothing you can do to stop that from happening. I agree with whoever said it’s important to teach them context, and make it clear that there are some words you never, ever say, like the n word or the r word or homophobic slurs, and that you’ll get your ass kicked if you ever do.

    I also think an 8-year-old should be smart enough not to say the F word in front of their parents. I wonder if they’re hearing their parents swear so they don’t think it’s taboo to drop curse words in front of them. Like, hey dumb kids, don’t do bad stuff in front of the adults in charge of your discipline, and problem solved.

    #1008630 Reply
    avataranonymousse
    Participant

    I got the poster and the other person confused, so when I read her comment it made it seem like she taught her kid all the words when they turned eight. It is my mistake.

    From my experience as a parent, it’s pretty shocking when an eight year old lets the word “fuck” fly. I absolutely think most kids learn the words and use them but are smart enough not to do it in front of adults. I was reacting to what I misperceived in that response above.

    #1008647 Reply
    avatarKarebear1813
    Participant

    I think its odd LW sister didnt pick the phone up long before this gathering to address this. It seems like she might have been avoiding this subject but I dont think this is a subject to avoid unless LW is confrontational and super defensive.

    #1008651 Reply
    avatarKate
    Keymaster

    @Anonymousse, I used to swear with my friends like crazy in elementary school, but I knew it wasn’t ok to say those words in front of my parents. They personally never ever said shit or fuck or other words like that, and I knew it’d be a hassle to get yelled at.

    I think 8-year-olds are smart. I figure if they’re letting curse words fly in front of mom and dad it’s bc they know they can get away with it / don’t think it’s a big deal. The parents involved here probably swear within kids’ earshot.

    #1008677 Reply
    avatarBittergaymark
    Guest

    I honestly don’t recall when I started swearing. But I suspect it was much later than 8. There is no way I said “fuck” until the middle of highschool. I have a pretty vivid memory, too, typically. But yeah. The internet has accellerated everything. Rather horrifically.

    #1009122 Reply
    avatarPuddin’
    Guest

    Ugh. Why is it so hard to believe their “precious angels” are really little assholes? No wonder he behaves this way, when told of his behavior, YOU GET MAD AT THE ADULT FOR TELLING YOU WHAT HE DID. *sigh* I’m trying not to be mean but it is frustrating. Apologize to your sister and talk to your son.

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