It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Deprived Newlywed” (LW2) whose new husband rarely wanted to have sex and would often reject the LW’s initiating sex, telling her he felt like a piece of meat and that he needed more compliments to get into the mood. Her update below.
My husband and I continued with counseling and working on communication and my guilt reaction and his anger one. And then at the end of last year, I got pregnant! We’ve been both overjoyed and he has been the most nurturing, gentle, motivated person. It’s like being a dad kicked him into high gear, and I got super confident in ensuring our home was happy and functioning. We’ve been just clicking, and having lots of time together during Covid solidified how comfortable and easy it was to get together. A few really shitty fights in the past don’t seem to define today at all, and we’re excited for our first kid to show up in a few weeks!
How exciting – congratulations! And best wishes for a smooth and easy delivery in a few weeks! I hope your husband continues working on his anger and that the gaslighting he was doing shortly after you married doesn’t resurface as he faces new challenges of parenthood.
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.
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