It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from Second Chance? who wondered whether she should reunite with a boyfriend who had a hard time closing the door on prior relationships, including with an ex-wife and another ex-girlfriend. Her update is below.
After my initial email and reading all the responses, I decided to step back and see how things played out. My ex changed jobs, dropped out of therapy, and stopped making any attempt to fix things between us, but he wanted to keep me around. It was so similar to how our relationship had gone that I got out…quickly.
I told him that he needed to get his life together and sorted out. I told him I was moving on and not to contact me. At first, he seemed unfazed by it. Now he constantly wants to talk and work things out. Shocker, since I’ve started seeing someone new.
I’ll never take that man back again. It’s a shame, I loved him very deeply. But having some perspective, I see he never really felt that way about me.
Thanks for everything, Wendy!
Thanks for the update, and I hope today’s LW #3 is just as smart!
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.