It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Waiting To Hear The Words” who was tired of waiting for her boyfriend of seven months to say “I love you” and wondered if she should say it to him first. “My fear is this: if he doesn’t say it back, I might revert to the insecure, unstable girl that I [once] was. I don’t want the constant anxiety and tears, always thinking that I’m not good enough to be loved. What should I do?” Find out what she decided after the jump.
Thanks so much for your advice. I realized that thinking everything to death comes from a place of insecurity and only causes unnecessary stress. I believe I’m at a point in my life where I’m strong enough to tell someone that I love them, simply because I feel it, and not because I need to hear it back. I also took into consideration one reader’s comment about the “Languages of Love.” My boyfriend shows his love for me in so many ways; he makes me feel cherished and considered at every turn. And since words are MY language of love, I decided to just go ahead and express myself. His response was… “Me too”… Which was disappointing, I have to admit. But he’s still there for me in all the wonderful ways he was before. So, I just have to remind myself that people show love in their own ways and in their own time. And right now I’m totally excited about the Valentine’s date we have planned 🙂
If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.