Updates: “Worried for His Patients” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Worried for His Patients” who wondered if she should report her abusive ex-boyfriend whom she’d recently heard was getting certified to be a therapist. “My soul itches at the thought of this guy near vulnerable women,” she wrote. After the jump, find out if she’s decided to pursue reporting him.

Thank you for your kind advice. It feels like a (not crushing, but a bit heavy) weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My life now is great for me, and I really hated the nagging thought that I was being selfish in not acting on a piece of information I’d been given. For readers who worried that I was still troubling my head over this guy in general: it’s okay, I’m not. I pretty much fled from our entire group of friends when I left him, with the exception of one I just couldn’t bear to lose —my best friend! She still has slight contact with him since his other ex is a friend of a relation of hers. We never talk about him as it’s a long time ago and is a not fun subject, but she heard about his new career path and knowing a bit about how things had been, thought I should know. We came to the same decision as you did, but it has been very, very good to have it backed up by you and the DW readers. After all, I got my second chance at a new life, and made good — maybe he will too. So thank you, and keep up the good work!

If you’re someone I’ve given advice to in the past, I’d love to hear from you, too. Email me at [email protected] with a link to the original post, and let me know whether you followed the advice and how you’re doing now.


  1. That’s good. I remember this one, and I wondered: who would you even report him TO? And could you do it without sounding like a psycho hose beast? (Probably not). I would hope that one could complete the schooling and training required to enter the field of psychology and either be weeded out for being a nutter or at least learn how to control their nuttiness. Plus, I heard a lot of shrinks have their own shrinks. Let’s hope he’s not actually using this as an avenue to victimize vulnerable patients but just as a career path.

    1. caitie_didn't says:

      +1000 for the use of psycho hose beast.

      1. Instant Karma says:

        This is completely off topic, but your username always makes me happy. 😀

  2. Such a good update. Thank you, LW!

  3. Need a little context here… I didn’t read the original post and there’s no mention of what advice Wendy gave. How about posting some specifics?

  4. Mike – the link to the original letter is above – see “Worried for His Patients”.

    1. Thanks – I must’ve overlooked the thread. BTW, it would still help to have a little more context in the update.

  5. Mike – the link to the original letter is above – see “Worried for His Patients”.

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